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Nannygate 2.0

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Oh. Em. Gee.

Boy, have I seen it all now! If you follow Happily Eva After, you know that I am a full-time Blogger who works around the clock running this startup business, and that my husband works for NBC Sports and is almost always on the road for work.  Full time childcare is a necessity for our family, and one which had gotten a bit shaky recently when I had to fire our Nanny of a year and a half on the spot.  It was a traumatic and bizarre experience and extremely inconvenient.  Well– we recovered, hired somebody else three weeks ago, and things were looking up.  And then this happened, and THIS IS EVEN MORE NUTS THAN YOU CAN IMAGINE.I’m telling this story because it’s in my nature to be brutally honest about my life– and also because when I texted it to one of my girlfriends right after it happened, she texted me back:  “My jaw just disintegrated.”  HOW CAN I NOT SHARE?!  Grab some popcorn and a cocktail because this story is trashy– really trashy.

On Tuesday of this past week, I was on a plane coming back from quick 24-hour business trip to New York City.  I had just been feeling so exhilarated by my little jaunt away from my Mommy responsibilities and totally re-energized to start the week off strong.  Kyle was at home with Marlowe, and our Nanny was working her usual daytime hours.  When I landed at 10am, I called Kyle to let him know I arrived safely and hear about how Marlowe’s morning had been so far. “Don’t panic,” he told me, “But I had to fire the Nanny this morning.  Let me tell you the whole story before you freak out.”   And tell me,  he did– while my stomach dropped out of my body and my hairs stood up on the back of my neck.   Here’s what happened:

The Nanny usually arrived at 9am (and stayed until 6pm).  She knew that I was arriving home on Tuesday but didn’t know what time.  An hour before she was supposed to arrive for the day, Kyle got a text message from her show up on his cell phone.  It said:

“OMG. Girl, did I mention to you how hot and sex my Boss is.  I would love to fuck his brains out ha haah.  Too bad he seems not to like thick Latin women with lots to hold on to LOL.”

Kyle couldn’t believe it.  He was completely disoriented.  Why had she sent this to him? It was such a crazy “mistake” but also strange because he had barely been around this person since she was hired.  A part of him thought it was so hilarious of course, but the greater part of him was head-in-hands embarrassed for her and couldn’t believe he was going to have to deal with the awkwardness of having to talk about something so uncomfortable.  He also was so confused, but figured in two seconds another text would come through from her with a million apologies, telling him she was so embarrassed…or something!  But nope.  He took Marlowe to breakfast.  Fifteen minutes went by, half an hour, an hour…finally it was time for her to arrive at work and he began to walk Marlowe home, sweating.  No acknowledgement had been made by her at all.  (This is where I laugh by the way– poor Kyle with his wife on a plane, wracking his brain for how to deal with this awkwardness by himself! Lol).  She had a key to our house.  It was 9:05 and by this point she had let herself in.  As Kyle went up the walkway to our home, he looked up at the house and saw her– peeking out of the curtains OF OUR BEDROOM WINDOW.

(Now at this point in Kyle’s story, the part of me who is the teenager who came of age in Brooklyn started bubbling up– and my hands started itching to take my earrings out and hold them while I got CRAZY.  But thankfully in reality I was just a tired Mom in an Uber with my drapey cardigan tied around my waist– and so I held it together.  Barely. )

Kyle said the way she was peeking out of the window in our bedroom made him realize, “Ok– that text was NOT a mistake.”  (By the way if you are a woman I’m sure YOU figured that out two paragraphs ago).  He let himself in to the house, handed over the baby, and she made absolutely no mention of the text at all.  He pointed out Marlowe’s snacks and lunch, and he rushed out to his 9:30am meeting. While he was at the meeting, however, he just didn’t feel right.  He had a pit in his stomach, and he told me he just knew he had to leave the meeting early and rush home to Marlowe– and to deal with the situation head on.

AND THIS IS WHY MY HUSBAND IS A LEGEND: He also realized in that moment that he was going to record his entire confrontation with her.  Because he knew that clearly this chick was crazy– and who knows what she would try to make up or twist after the fact. Thank you, Voicenotes on the iPhone– thank you for creating the single most captivating piece of entertainment that my girlfriends and I have ever passed around a kitchen table.  I’m writing out the convo in script form below, so you can get a sense of exactly what went down.  I would feel badly for this chick…except that, well, I REALLY don’t:

Kyle arrives home before the Nanny.  She is out on a walk.  He waits for her with the phone recording until you can hear the sound of she and Marlowe coming up the walkway

Kyle: Hey.  Lowie, come here– come over here with Dada

Nanny: I didn’t know you were going to be home now (this is said in a low and sultry voice)

Kyle: Yeah, I came home early….I actually wanted to ask you about something.

Nanny: Yeah…

Kyle: When I came home earlier, why were you in our bedroom?

Nanny: I was looking for you.

Kyle: What?

Nanny: I was looking for you, I didn’t know if you were home (By the way, if you have ever been to our home, there is ZERO reason for anyone except us to be going to our bedroom for any reason.  Especially her.  Probable Truth: she was in there smelling his underwear.  Or something even more crazy that I can’t even think of)

Kyle: (exasperated) Um. Ok.  Listen, this morning I got a really inappropriate text from you…

(pause)

Nanny: Oh yeah…Sorry

Kyle: Yeah. Ok.  Well… needless to say, it’s not the type of environment I want in the house with you taking care of our daughter.  So I’m going to have to ask you to go. I can pay you for today and then why don’t you go.

Nanny: Ok.

Kyle writes her a check while Marlowe asks for crackers

Kyle: Ok here you go. Thanks.

Nanny: I’m sorry I was just messing around with a friend I didn’t mean any harm.

Kyle: No need to apologize. Thanks, Bye.

(At this point she leaves and he turns the recording off)

So, at this point, by head was spinning. Clearly, that text was not a mistake.  If it had been a mistake, she would have been humiliated, so frantic to make it right (I’ve been there with mistaken texts, I know).  That text was sent out as a missive to test the proverbial waters with my husband and give her an opportunity later, when alone, to bring up a sexy dialogue with him.   Need more evidence? She sent it the only morning she had that his wife was out of town.  I felt a lot of things as I listened to this.  I felt anger, I felt pride in my husband for being so loyal (and smart) and handling it well, and I felt a huge betrayal also.  How dare this person, who we were paying very generously to care for our young daughter– how dare she use her time with my child, in my HOME, to plot out a way to screw my husband and screw up my family! It was beyond psychotic.  It was something that exemplified a truly broken person and that realization made me feel almost badly for her.  Almost.  It also made me grateful for my strong relationship with my husband.  I know that this happens all the time with different results.  The rumors of this type of thing are all over the tabloids all the time.  As I was thinking about this, I also realized something bone chilling:  I no longer had childcare.

I had exhausted all my resources trying to find this psycho– Kyle was about to go out of town for ten days– what on earth was I going to do with zero help and a business to run? Kyle and I put our heads together and came up with a plan.  And I was so grateful in that moment for the opportunity for teamwork, because it reminded me that no pathetic and conniving woman can ever come between us.

 

And this is what we hatched up:  We were going to go on Kyle’s trip together.  As a family. We would pack up a bunch of stuff, ship out even more, and spend some time on the East Coast where he works.  He could help me with Marlowe on his days off, and our families and close friends in the area could help, too.  We could take our time finding more full time help (againnnn) for Marlowe and make sure I was really comfortable after this crazy past month.  I would have the chance to continue working on the blog without stressing out about being alone all the time, too!  We had already planned to be out here for most of the Summer anyway, so this could be a little improvisation until we figure it out further.

So here we are: in Westchester.  Together.  Strangely, this bizarre Nanny experience brought us even closer (emotionally and geographically) than we would have been otherwise.  It’s had its (extremely) stressful moments, but it’s an adventure.  I’m looking forward to bringing you Happily Eva After from here for a while!

 

Thanks for coming along on this journey with me– and if my past month is any indication, the road definitely won’t be boring!

 

xoxo

EAM

 

 

 

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307 Comments

  1. Molly says:

    I am so sorry this happened to you and Kyle, especially after what you’ve already just gone through with Nannygate situation #1. This whole situation must have been an out of body experience! That being said, I absolutely ADORE how honest you are with every aspect of your life and seriously, you need to write a book! Your writing is always gripping, hilarious and interesting, no matter the topic.

    PS. Having been a nanny and babysitter in Connecticut for 10+ years, I know that finding someone to care for your child/letting them into your world is the biggest and most important decision making process ever, and I truly hope that the next person you find respects you both, and is the best Nanny in the world for your sake and Lowie’s!

    02.29.16Reply
    • Melinda says:

      What a WONDERFUL husband you have. I’m so sorry for this situation. I know that panic feeling of “OMG what now” & not knowing the next step for childcare. Great partnership of being pro-active & coming up with an answer, even if temporary, for now. Good luck finding a great (normal. Lol) new person. And THANKS SO MUCH for sharing your story!

      02.29.16Reply
      • Melinda says:

        Eva deserved it, for working & having a sitter for her child? Eva should “try a 3-some”? Eva is over-reacting? ARE U KIDDING ME PEOPLE? There are PREDITORS out there who prey on happily married normal people. Sick people! After reading these blogs I realize not only is the nanny a whack job but some of these repliers are also. So gross- some things people are saying. Gross! And the 3-some girl, who’s gonna have 1 with your fiancée? Go crawl back under your rock- you’re a twisted human & disgusting.

        03.01.16Reply
        • Happy for You says:

          My sentiments exactly.

          03.01.16Reply
          • Cryatal says:

            Totally agree that this woman broke every code here, without a doubt. You both handled this situation in an amazingly appropriate way! BUT, as a person living with a Mental Health disorder, I would be remiss if I didn’t flag your use of the word “Psycho/crazy/Psychotic. It leads people to believe that those words have the most negative of connotations and that those words are only associated with low life, trasy, people with zero impulse control who only do unsavory things. I’m a huge fan of your writing and honesty and just wanted to offer a take from a devoted reader. x

            03.02.16
        • Lisa says:

          This is unfortunately, the morality level of alot of our young people today… a sick form of narcissistic electronic behavior. Selfies as well.. Good for your amazing husband and your obviously solid relationsip. You and yours are indeed blessed!

          PS: big fan of your mama and all the amazing roles she has played over the years. Beauty indeed runs in the family, as does strength of character. 🙂

          03.02.16Reply
        • anonymous supporter says:

          dang, people are hateful and judgmental. good gracious, what a sad life to go out of your way to hate on someone who is trying their best? child care is child care – whether it’s the girl from church, school, WHEREVER that offered to help watch your kids while you go to the doctor or a full time nanny. the girl crossed a boundary. period. if your sweet babysitter that helps you a few times a week was to send anyone in your family an accidental text like that – would you seriously continue to have her in your home around your children? around your husband? parents work – we grew up as latchkey kids – ran around, watched general hospital after the elementary bell rang and let us out of school, and so much more that we wouldn’t have done had we had proper childcare set up for us. my parents did their best and would have paid for a nanny if they could afford it. more power to you if you have the money to do it! eva, people are going to hate. hope the criticism and judgmental tones just give you more power to continue to be a strong working mother that is an example of love to her child. do your thing!

          03.02.16Reply
        • Michelle Schenck says:

          I agree. Whoever said that Eva deserved it and should try a threesome and that she is overeacting is a pig. They have probabley never been faithful to their partners and think this is ok. Kudos to Kyle for the way he handled it. I wish all husbands would handle the situation like that. Sounds like he is a keeper of a husband.

          03.03.16Reply
          • Newfiefarmwife says:

            My sentiments exactly

            03.06.16
        • Grace says:

          I agree with the caution in choosing another care taker for your daughter Eva. It seems like a few people on this reply blog, would like to have this position. Again caution. Maybe nanny cams in every room. Good luck to you. Love your mother’s work as a film star.

          03.05.16Reply
        • audrey83 says:

          Haha! YESSSS!! God the normal ppl left in the world are getting fewer and farther between. I’m not judging, to each their own. Just don’t push yourself on a happily married couple

          06.02.16Reply
    • I’m a retired nurse and own Brookside Nannies. We care for families who are vegan or vegetarian or will allow these meals instead of meat. We are be happy to travel to take care of your children. We also make organic hand knitted sweaters and children’s clothes and bedding. Please like our Facebook Page Brookside Nannies.

      03.01.16Reply
    • Deb says:

      The story is disgusting and your reaction is absolutely normal (right down to thanking iPhone for the app!).

      I hope that the next few months become disgustingly, boringly normal. An unexciting life is something to be treasured. This I have learned from personal experience.

      And I agree. Your husband is indeed a LEGEND!

      03.02.16Reply
    • Vicky says:

      Wow! What a crazy world we live in. The idea of hiring someone to take care of your child in your absence is a leap of trust and faith. Someone to become Part of the family. To turn that into such a careless and disgusting so called opportunity is horrible. Your husband handled the situation beautifully!! I love that his true mission was to protect your daughter and your marriage. Marriage, family & love is sacred and sadly has to be protected from those who don’t value “yours”.

      03.04.16Reply
    • Kasey says:

      As a babysitter since I was 10 and now a nanny for the last 7ish years I find this absolutely unbelievable! I don’t know much about you all, but I do know what it takes to be a great nanny and I am so glad you got rid of her asap! If I lived near you I would be applying and hoping to get hired as your next nanny. Your daughter is ADORABLE! I hope and pray you find someone worth letting into your home!

      03.05.16Reply
  2. Hannah says:

    GET OUT! I knew from your snap last night this post was going to be juicy, but this?! This is straight-out-of-a-movie INSANITY! Thank goodness Kyle was able to handle the situation in a cool and calm manner.

    Way to take this crazy situation and make the best of it! That’s all you can do sometimes… see the positive in even the craziest circumstances.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Z Bloom says:

      I don’t think it’s that big a deal- so she tried to hit on him.
      He said No.
      Probably because he doesn’t like thick Hispanic women.
      Don’t be silly. If he likes the next one, there’s gonna be sexy time happening.

      03.01.16Reply
      • Harry Svennson says:

        Kyle’s rejecting this psycho nanny had nothing to do with her weight or ethnicity. He rejected her because he loves and respects his wife, the extraordinary Ms. Amurri Martino. Is that a concept too difficult for you to understand?

        “I don’t think it’s that big a deal- so she tried to hit on him.” Your lack of respect for the marriage covenant is just more evidence of advancing cultural rot in the western world.

        03.01.16Reply
        • Diana Londyn says:

          I agree ! Kyle loves his wife ❤️ Marriage is Sacred 💫 this is a perverse world now a days , but , we still have many who believe in love.

          Not everyone cheats because someone is their type or attractive. Come on….

          03.01.16Reply
        • Jamie says:

          Awesome reply Harry, couldn’t agree more.

          03.01.16Reply
        • Elisheva says:

          I love it!! Great reply – you hit the nail on the head!! Very sad and ignorant to put down the what should be ‘normal’ response of a good husband. Unfortunately not all men are made the same. I can appreciate, as I have a wonderful, good man as well 🙂
          May your family always be happy and strong!

          03.01.16Reply
        • Penny S. says:

          I agree, there is an advancing cultural rot in this world — such an increasing lack of respect for others and a lack of morals! If people lived by the Golden Rule… Do unto others as you would have them do onto you, the world in general would be a better, more respectful place! Those who blame Eva for this nanny gate are probably just like the nanny themselves, not respectful of others, which is why they defend her!

          03.01.16Reply
        • Grace says:

          Agreed I couldn’t say it any better. What a lack of common respect.

          03.05.16Reply
      • big_d says:

        Speaking as a guy, no. Was married 33 yrs., (wife passed away) never, ever, cheated. ALL of my wifes friends hit on me at one time or another, Turned them down flat. I’m not some saint, I just believed that when you are together, you ARE together, no exceptions.

        03.01.16Reply
        • Lady says:

          How sweet!

          03.01.16Reply
          • GL Tom says:

            Very Nice … wonder why friends hit on you?

            04.18.16
        • Jenn says:

          That’s very sweet, but seriously – ALL of your wife’s friends. Really???

          03.02.16Reply
        • scott says:

          Wow, big D, you didn’t cheat on your wife. You’re a superstar. Especially when ALL of your wife’s chums hit on you. Bring on the Nobel!

          btw…I have never beaten my elderly mother. What awards do I get?

          03.02.16Reply
          • Ha!!

            03.03.16
          • Michelle says:

            Thank you for that comment, Scott! LOL
            If you choose a monogamous relationship there should be no accolades necessary for avoiding a random sexual encounter. Sometimes people (women included) seem to think men as a whole are more tempted which is such a crock… Women are tested just as often. Not saying what he did wasn’t great but rather it’s sad that these situations are so few and far between that we are happily surprised to hear about them.
            Here’s to true love! 🙂

            03.03.16
      • Kathleen says:

        She totally violated the trust of BOTH of her employers. Honestly, a lack of morality is exactly what NO ONE wants for a nanny who is meant to help and mentor precious child all day!

        03.01.16Reply
      • Jireh says:

        Are you serious? I give props to the husband. We don’t need any more Arnolds or Bens, etc. We need men to be faithful to their wives. Apparently, the nanny was delusional and thought more of herself than she should have. We do have some sick puppies in this world and the nanny is definitely fitting the bill. It is always an honor to find a man that loves and is devoted to his wife, daughter, and making his marriage work. Not only did he let his wife know he is committed, when his daughter hears later on it life what someone attempted to do to her father, she’ll know it is never okay to mess with another woman’s husband, boyfriend, etc. Because of her father setting up precedence, she’ll have no excuse. Eva, you are blessed. Now go make that man happy:)

        03.01.16Reply
  3. Elizabeth says:

    Whoa! I’m so sorry this happened to you and your family. I pray you find another nanny that’s honest and trustworthy.

    02.29.16Reply
  4. Liz says:

    Whoa. I am horrified for you but at least you and Kyle have the best story ever! Good luck finding someone wonderful asap!

    02.29.16Reply
  5. Cuba says:

    You’re shipping stuff out? Does that mean you’re planning to stay for a while or just until the 10 day trip is over! Amazing opportunity for family time!

    02.29.16Reply
  6. Alisha says:

    I feel bad for you for two reasons. One, you are again out of a nanny. On top of that you trust of someone taking care of your kid has been damaged again. Secondly, you bond with Kyle was tested by someone you trusted. I’m glad that y’all are spending some time together. Hopefully it will give you the opportunity to find and research potential nanny options. Good luck!

    02.29.16Reply
  7. Taryn says:

    So insane. But, thank you for sharing as it restores my ever-shaken faith in the existence of strong and loyal marriages and especially men. You two make each other better and it’s an inspiration! Proud of you. Good luck with the search!

    Xoxo
    Taryn

    02.29.16Reply
    • Hope says:

      Well said and very true. Woman should be supporting each other, not desperately searching for the opportunity to get with your man. The worst part is she used your child as a catapult. I am happy to hear she landed right on her face. Props to both your husband and you! ❤️

      03.01.16Reply
  8. Antonia says:

    Eva, dear,
    This tale is woeful, at more levels than you have verbalized, and which will occur to you over time. How can you trust your child to someone of this immature crassness? I sympathize with your pull between excellent mothering and your work. This is your former 8th grade teacher, now retired. I am more than willing and very capable to assist with impeccable child care here on the east coast. Let me know if you are interested. xx

    02.29.16Reply
    • Diane says:

      You know, maybe what Eva and Kyle need is an older woman who would nurture all 3 of them. A Grandmotherly type with an education and class who would love nothing more than a surrogate family to cook for and take care of. One who would also have the utmost respect for their employers. A young couple of this station should never have to worry about their baby’s care. They have plenty enough to worry about.

      02.29.16Reply
    • Michelle says:

      I think that having your retired eighth grade teacher watch over your little family is a great idea!! That is if you remember her fondly. Lol. It wouldn’t hurt to meet with her anyway. Good luck with your search. I hope you find the best possible nanny for your little girl!!

      03.03.16Reply
  9. Azalia Bernhardt says:

    I.CANT.EVEN. 😳
    I have no words. So incredibly sorry you had to go through this. Your Snap gave clues but holy moly guacamole!!! I think the solution you guys came up with is brilliant though 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
    Spending more time together as a family and visiting family/friends is never a bad thing ☺️👍🏻
    I really hope this woman really thinks about why this all happened. She must find the root of the problem because she is also damaging her own family. I think I’ll pray for her.
    I look forward to your new East Coast adventures yay!

    PS Your hubby is a rock star 🙌🏻

    Azalia

    02.29.16Reply
  10. Laura says:

    WOW, that is insane! I applaud you for being able to roll with the punches and figure out a temporary solution for your family.

    P.S. I can’t stand a woman that goes after a married man, there is nothing trashier!!

    02.29.16Reply
  11. Cathrine says:

    That’s a crazy story!
    Happy to live in Norway with government-supported childcare. The kindergardens here are really good, educational and safe, with trained and educated personel! The children and working fathers and mothers loves it! Of course it’s up to the parents how much of their day the kid would be there, and it is common to have the kids there at part time in the first years. We do have the first year in paid parental leave though, most of us get the ordinary salary this year. Also a very good and safe familiy politic.

    (Go Bernie:))

    02.29.16Reply
  12. Amanda says:

    You seem like a genuinely sweet person and you have a beautiful family. I feel bad you had to deal with this. As a nanny myself, I can’t even wrap my head around someone being so unprofessional and trying to screw around with a married man. She was clearly in it for the wrong reasons. I’m glad yoy are making the most out if it. Marlowe surely enjoys seeing both of you on the regular.

    02.29.16Reply
  13. Tai says:

    Woah.

    That is some kinda crazy.

    You really picked a good man, Eva!

    I’m so sorry you had to deal with this. It makes me want to drop everything and move to LA to be your nanny and help you guys out! Man oh man, this is the kind of thing that just keeps popping back into the front of you mind and you just shake your head. Wow. Totally unbelievable craziness…what was her plan for entertaining Marlowe while they got busy?

    Thanks for letting us know that crazy things can happen even if you’re rich/famous/beautiful/happy/thin/a blogger!

    02.29.16Reply
  14. Shae wall says:

    There are unfortunately women out there who just don’t care about other people’s families or marriages and only want what they want any way they can get it. I’ve come across them myself. I’m sorry you guys had to go through this again! If we weren’t so far away I’d love to be your nanny. I myself am married with a 5 year old after our miscarriage last year still no luck with more kids. I’m very proud of your husband for doing the right thing! You are a very lucky woman indeed! Good luck and hopefully the next nanny will be the perfect fit! (Not to mention a sane one) 🙂

    02.29.16Reply
  15. Raina says:

    this is INSANE!!! OMG. So sorry you are dealing with this nonsense AGAIN.

    02.29.16Reply
  16. Ruth says:

    What about that amazing birthday cake the nanny made Kyle???

    02.29.16Reply
  17. Nina says:

    Ugh I’m so angry for you and still can’t believe the audacity. There’s a special place in hell for home wreckers.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Susan Spiegel says:

      I am 68 years young and I feel the solution to this can easily be rectified. If you hire an older, mature nanny that kind of looks like Mrs. Doubtfire Hollywood wives would have nothing to worry about. Not only would they know better they would probably have absolutely no interest in the man, but surely would be great for the children.

      03.01.16Reply
      • JJ says:

        Good idear Miss Susan.

        03.05.16Reply
  18. Donna says:

    SO sorry as I read your story this morning! Hate you and your little family had to go through this !!! The girl was obviously
    Cray cray 😳 Inviting a Nanny into your home is one of the biggest decisions a family can make, as my Sister also had a hard time finding someone she and her kids liked and trusted, but she did and I am sure that you will too! Good luck !

    02.29.16Reply
  19. Beth Dixon says:

    Many years ago I was a working mother with 4 kids under 4 years old, a job with pretty inflexible hours, and a wonderful husband who traveled frequently for his employment. We did not live close to any extended family. Our childcare prayers were answered in the form of the Au Pair program sanctioned through the US Department of State. For several years, we had a series of delightful young men and women reside in our home. The benefits were marvelous- my children received great care, learned about other cultures, and made life long friends. As a added bonus, I enjoyed having a young adult in the house to keep me company during my husband’s frequent business trips. I know that it involves some leap of faith, and it isn’t for everybody, but we loved being a part of the Au Pair network. My children are all young adults today, and we still keep in touch with several of our former Au Pairs.

    02.29.16Reply
  20. E says:

    I am so sorry you are living out your own Lifetime movie! Much luck!!

    02.29.16Reply
  21. Abbie says:

    Hi Eva!

    I am so sorry to hear about Nanny number 2. My heart really does go out to you and the family as I know it can be hard trying to work and balance children. Your husband was super smart and it shows how much he loves you! Keep being awesome guys, cuddles to you all x

    Abbie x

    02.29.16Reply
  22. alexandra says:

    holy heavens! that is seriously bad nanny luck. but it sounds like your little family unit handled it really well.
    i live in westchester and would highly recommend a visit to stone barns. i’m sure your daughter would love it. i take my son there often. animals, tractors, a cafe . . lots to see and do. it’s lovely. if you would like any other recommendations/ideas of things to do in th area, let me know and –
    enjoy the east coast! x

    02.29.16Reply
  23. Tricia Woly says:

    Oh. Em. Gee. is right!! Play-date in New Jersey!! Marlowe and Emily are two months apart would have a blast!! Thanks for sharing.

    02.29.16Reply
  24. Jami says:

    OMG. I truly cannot imagine! Thanks so much for sharing, it’s been quite the morning read.

    02.29.16Reply
  25. Andrea says:

    Wow, that is insane. Insane and wretched. Hats off to your husband for following his instinct to protect your daughter, hats off to him for facing such a wretched situation head on rather than pushing it under the rug to avoid awkwardness, and hats off to both of you for having a strong enough relationship that he felt safe to share this with you (so many women would fly off the handle even when their husband is innocent). Hats off to you for handling it with class and perseverance. Good grief you’ve had a stressful time! It says a lot about your character that through all of the nanny disasters you have found a silver lining, a strengthening of your marriage.

    I hope your next nanny stories are delightful or at least uneventful!

    -Andrea

    02.29.16Reply
  26. K says:

    This story isn’t as crazy as it is awkward. I doubt the nanny would’ve ever taken it further but I’m so embarrassed for her!!

    02.29.16Reply
    • Heather says:

      I would say that it’s a little more than simply awkward – from what has been described, the nanny’s behaviour has been wholly unprofessional and well, creepy. I also don’t like the way this has been handled. It’s little gross to publish the details in such a way. Sure, bad things happen to (good) people, but it’s how we deal with it that shows real character. What doesn’t sit well with me, is that it seems as though she was almost giddy with excitement to have something (salacious) to post on her blog. Unfortunately, no one but the husband comes out of this, looking good.

      03.01.16Reply
      • Tai says:

        I disagree. No one knows the nanny, so what’s the harm?

        03.01.16Reply
      • Josie says:

        Agreed.

        03.01.16Reply
      • Kristin says:

        Yeah umm its a blog..that is what she does is write things that people want to read about! Her whole blog is about her life and this is something that happened. She wrote it exactly how it happened so the only one that comes out of this looking like an ass is the nanny. If you don’t like it then read someone elses blog, or better yet find something better to do than negatively comment. If the husband wrote about it I guarantee you wouldn’t be writing the same thing.. Looks like you are just as bad as the nanny Heather! Jealous much?

        03.01.16Reply
        • Heather says:

          Kirsten, your comment doesn’t make any sense. Do you understand the concept involving opinions? It’s not unusual for people to have differing ones. In fact, we’re having a difference of opinion, right here – that is what this is. Having a difference of opinion is part of the human experience – it happens every day, I just hope you’ll be able to cope with the stress of it all. I could also expand on your baseless assertion that “She wrote it exactly how it happened” vs questionable universal truths, but baby steps, yeah?

          03.02.16Reply
          • Amy says:

            Heather, you are soooo much smarter than us!!!

            03.03.16
          • Ro says:

            I agree, it is a blog and a business and interesting and sometimes salacious stories “sell.” Also, there are others out there that have experienced a similar situation with a very different ending and it may be helpful to see that there are good men out there. I enjoyed reading it and just made me thankful for my husband who would do the same, of that I have NO doubt.

            04.30.16
      • Steph88b says:

        Then don’t read her blog ! This is written from her point of view which resonates with many women who may have faced similar circumstances. Maybe not dealing with a Nanny but infidelity is all too common. She wrote about it out of pride for her husband and I’d rather read this uplifting story of true love and respect rather than another story full of anger, resentment and gruesome details of a nasty divorce any day.

        03.05.16Reply
  27. Max says:

    Kely is stunning!!! I dont meen any … lol

    02.29.16Reply
  28. Camila says:

    Oh my god! After your snapchat I was anxiously awaiting your tale today. I’m a fellow blogger and actually had a day free from my little guys so I was busy working away and then suddenly remembered you must have posted what happened.
    I can’t believe what happened! What a crazy lady! Kyle is the best! He made such a great call! Enjoy your time on the East Coast!

    Camila

    02.29.16Reply
  29. jeezlouise says:

    Get over yourself…

    02.29.16Reply
    • Mary says:

      I feel the same. You live a life of privilege and don’t know what what most of us dealt with; losing a child care provider can mean losing your job and your income. And you couldn’t have paid the nanny more than a day’s wage? She’s probably living paycheck to paycheck. You should have given her more than that! You can afford it. And, frankly, I don’t think what the nanny did was even that awful. You’re extremely lucky you can afford this kind of childcare. Quit your whining.

      02.29.16Reply
      • anne louise says:

        Your a bitch. The whore is lucky she even got a days pay ! She’s also lucky she didn’t have her teeth rammed down her throat. If you don’t feel messing with a woman’s man is wrong, you’ve got a lot to learn. But maybe that’s the desperate way you make YOUR living. Your pathetic.

        02.29.16Reply
        • Sally says:

          You sound very unstable and violent. I don’t think anyone is saying what the nanny did is acceptable. Just that it is UNREMARKABLE meaning this happens all the time. The way the blogger was acting, is was as if the nanny had been caught in an elaborate plot to murder someone or something like that.

          03.01.16Reply
          • Kristin says:

            Umm I can tell you right now that if my nanny ever did this she would be lucky to walk out of my house! I could care less if anything actually happened or not. Its about trust, respect, and not having a trashy whore watching a child! What an amazing influence. I feel sorry for every child of every idiot posting negatively here… I hope your life is turned upside down then lets see what song you are singing then.. Morons!

            03.01.16
          • Sally says:

            Kristen I feel sorry for any child of a parent who thinks that level of violence is acceptable.

            03.04.16
        • Kristin says:

          AMEN!!! I wouldn’t have paid her a dime and if she was my nanny she would be LUCKY to only have a blog post written about her!

          03.01.16Reply
      • mommynotnanny says:

        My thoughts exactly.Eva sounds like a bloody drama queen.Making something out of nothing.How about taking care of her own darm child.How about sitting down with the nanny and setting boundaries.It is also not ok for Eva to speak about her nanny in such a public way.I bet she had the nanny sign a confidentiality clause.Meaning the nanny can’t talk about her.I would like to hear the nanny’s side of the story.Eva get a life,be a woman not a girl and grow the f**k up.Now go raise your own darm kid.

        02.29.16Reply
        • KG says:

          Are you serious? It makes me sad for you that you’re a woman who hates on other women instead of accepting and applauding them.

          03.01.16Reply
          • Sally says:

            Yet it is ok for women to hate on the nanny who is also a woman? Make up your mind.

            03.04.16
        • Penny S. says:

          What is wrong with you?

          03.01.16Reply
          • Sally says:

            What is wrong with you, Penny?

            03.04.16
        • Kristin says:

          There is nothing wrong with working mothers!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just because she works and has a nanny who stays with the child when she has business meetings etc.. does not mean she is not raising her own child. Get over yourself! I would put everything on the fact you are no perfect mother by any means… Don’t read the blog if you are going to be a c**t

          03.01.16Reply
          • Sally says:

            C word? Wow, what a nasty piece of work you are! I feel sorry for any child you have. What a feral you are. Shame on you!!

            03.04.16
          • Amy says:

            I love how condescending people like Kristin are they have their opinion but they act like if someone doesn’t agree with THEM, they are stupid. Don’t even bother with her Sally, she is not worth it.

            03.04.16
        • Ldg says:

          I worked for an attorney, whose wife put him through college. She was a stay at home mother, who had a housekeeper come in three times a week, as she was involved in volunteering and community activities. Her family, is very prominent in the community. The woman had been her housekeeper for years, they became somewhat friends. The day came when the children went off to college, but she kept the housekeeper on. Well within the year of the children leaving, the housekeeper started an affair with the husband. He left his wife and married the housekeeper. I learned this from the housekeepers niece. You see, she said get aunt admitted that it was her plan to marry rich and did didn’t care how she got there. She said she felt bad for the lady, but she should have learned how to clean and cook as well as other wifely duties that was her last and her gain. She even went on to encourage her Nece to do the same in order to find a good husband. So there are women out there who have ulterior motives. She told her she would never hire anyone to work inside of her home for that reason.

          03.06.16Reply
      • Tai says:

        If she’s living paycheck to paycheck, maybe she should try to keep her job instead of jump her boss’ bones? One day’s work is plenty.

        03.01.16Reply
        • Kristin says:

          THANK YOU!

          03.01.16Reply
      • Kristin says:

        I fired a nanny who was about to loose her house because she went against my orders and spanked my son! Hope she’s on the street along with this home wrecking whore! You are an idiot for making this seem like an OK situation. I had to quit my job after this happened and lost an amazing income working in TV production. If you can’t be professional, follow simple orders and do your job with dignity then you don’t deserve to watch my children. Plus I wouldn’t trust ANYONE with that motive in the back of their head.. God only knows what kind of crazy nonsense she would say to the child.

        03.01.16Reply
        • Sally says:

          Maybe your son needed to be spanked and you don’t know what he is like.

          03.04.16Reply
      • Steph88b says:

        Troll much ?

        03.05.16Reply
  30. Sue says:

    Eva,
    Oh Dear….you, Kyle and Marlowe have had quite a baptism by fire with Nannygate 1&2. Do I need to get my Family Nanny apron out? I’m sure I can get excellent references. (Grandmarcia will give me a glowing one!) I am thrilled that you and Kyle are listening to your gut instincts. I am in awe of how candid you are….Remember that your daughters safety is the most important…there is a reason you feel off….because something is off! Sending love and hugs to all! Auntie Sue

    02.29.16Reply
  31. Alex says:

    Eva, this story is crazy!!! I love you for sharing it. I’ve been enjoying your blog since it started and am a loyal IG follower. It took until now, this crazy post, for me to comment. Thanks for being so real and sharing it with us. As a mom of two, I feel terrible that this happened to you! Hang in there- enjoy your “working vacation” as a family. Someone awesome will come along!!

    02.29.16Reply
  32. Dayna says:

    What a coo coo for cocoa puffs bit of a bad lifetime movie (most I love in spite of their cheesiness) this sounds like it was pulled from. I mean I cant believe such craziness has occurred within such small amounts of time…so close together. I adore you (in the way I imagine most of us all LOOOVE Jennifer Garner and consider her to be a good gal pal despite never actually meeting said CELEBRITY, LOL) and I live to read your blog. As a new, first time mom, I struggle with many of the same issues and have ALL of the same funnies and OMG baby/toddler moments you so lovingly share. I love your honesty and openness.
    Im saddened you have had to endure such cra cra’ness these last few months, but I have IMMENSELY enjoyed reading about them all with a caramel macchiato (extra caramel, hold the milk, add the vanilla soy, Please) in hand. Your writing is so down to earth and refreshing I literally feel like im reading/talking to my closest gf.
    Lowie is a doll, and your relationship with your husband seems to be enviable. Stay strong, keep your sense of humor and enjoy this momma train…its a bumpy road 🙂
    -Carrington’s Momma sends u tons of hugs

    02.29.16Reply
  33. Shahed S. says:

    Hello Mrs. Martino:

    I am so sorry to hear about this incident. It was so awesome the way you and your husband handled it, it just shows once again what a great and strong family you guys are! This nanny is obviously out of her mind.
    When I was growing up (late 80’s early 90’s) we lived in the San Jose area, and my mom was herself a babysitter. She did it for a living, while my dad was gone a lot because of work. She actually contemplated getting a babysitter for me and my sister, but one of her motivations in becoming a babysitter herself was because she did not trust anybody to take care of me and my sister. So she just decided to become a baby sitter herself, and look after other kids, while looking after me and my sister. Her philosophy was always that no matter what, you cannot trust a complete stranger with your kids, because at the end of the day, they are just that, strangers.
    Having said that, she gradually could not to the babysitting task anymore because of other demands. There were people that she did trust to take care of me and my sister, but those were close relatives (I mean like super close) to the point where they were 100 percent beyond a reasonable doubt trustworthy. The problem was that these relatives lived so far away that they could only come for short intervals.
    I guess what I am trying to say is that it is hard to find somebody you can trust to take care of your kids, plus the people you do trust are busy. When my mother couldn’t look after us herself, she would entrust us to our neighbors. I found that of all the people, neighbors were the most trust worthy because the fact that they live next to you creates a particular bond in and of itself (kind of like an extended family). Close family is a good option too, but the problem sometimes is that there can be fights when they get too intermingled with your personal life (at least it was that way with my family!)
    So when I read your story I could relate to my own childhood. It is not just that we cannot entrust our kids to particular nannies, as we grow up, kids are entrusted to school teachers, then there is junior high, high school, in all these places I encountered teachers who were positive and influential, and some people who were just plain jerks!
    It was great to read how both you and your husband handled the nanny, and methodically got to the bottom of the situation. I hope I have your guys’ patience and resolve when I become a parent 🙂

    02.29.16Reply
  34. Jenn says:

    Am I the only one who feels a little bad for the nanny here? I think the text honestly was a mistake and you and your husband are reading a bit too much into it. If I’d sent a text like that to my boss mistake I would be so embarrassed and would probably never mention it or send a follow up text apologizing. I would just want to forget it ever happened and would hope my boss would too. She didn’t freak out or act crazy at all when she was terminated, which is what a psycho Lifetime-movie nanny would have done. Sorry, if I’m reading it wrong but because of my own background when I hear these stories I always look at it from the side of the employee.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Kimber says:

      No you’re not the only one.

      02.29.16Reply
      • KG says:

        This isn’t about if she’s psycho, it’s about if she crossed a line. Once you know another woman wants to f your husbands “brains out”, whether by mistake or not, and you find her in your bedroom a line has been crossed and they are well within their rights to not feel comfortable having her in their home,

        03.01.16Reply
        • Jenn says:

          Kyle is a handsome guy who’s in the public eye, there’s probably a lot of women who want to errr…get to know him better. Doesn’t mean they’d actually go for it. That’s why I think it’s an overreaction. Don’t we all have celebrity crushes?

          03.02.16Reply
    • Teri says:

      It could have been a mistake, sending it to him for sure, but the thought was still there and not too many couples I know would want someone even thinking that in their house, let alone watching their kids. Not to mention she was in their bedroom uninvited- enough proof for me to think she ignores even the most obvious boundries. I think firing her was the right thing to do.

      02.29.16Reply
      • Stephanie Lorenzo says:

        I agree, if it was just a text mistake then there’s no reason for the woman to be in her bedroom.

        02.29.16Reply
        • jenn says:

          Not sure if I agree about the whole bedroom thing. I have two friends that are child care providers, one is a live in nanny. They gave her complete access to their home, she had a key. Maybe she was snooping, who knows, but most nannies do a little snooping when the parents are out. Maybe she was hoping he left the phone so she could delete the text, who knows. The stories I could tell you about entitled parents.

          03.01.16Reply
          • Nicole says:

            “Most nannies do some snooping?” I’m a former nanny, and I absolutely never snooped through my employers home. I never went into their bedroom even though they told me I had free reign of the entire home. There’s NEVER a reason to go into the employer’s bedroom. That’s way creepy. Their former nanny is clearly immature and even more unprofessional.

            03.01.16
    • Angela says:

      I totally agree with you, it sounds exaggerated for the sake of attention. Seriously it’s a very common thing to send a text to the wrong person. Eva is making up her own lifetime movie because the nanny seemed really embarrassed by the whole situation and just left.

      02.29.16Reply
    • Elizabeth Harrison says:

      Not the only one. And it actually comes across as immature and petty that Eva would try to publicly shame this person in her blog. Its unfortunate that this happened and letting the nanny go was probably the right thing to do, but this blog reads like “mean girl” type drama.

      03.01.16Reply
  35. Pam says:

    As a married, stay-at-home mom & Latin woman – I’M SO SORRY!!! The Nuyorican girl in me would have thrown in down with nanny 2.0. My husband would have handled it the same way Kyle did, however. It’s times like these you realize who you married. Good luck with the new search!

    02.29.16Reply
  36. Helen B says:

    I read this twice. TWICE. Holy wow. You are one classy lady for filtering out every expletive I’m sure you had for this situation and the she-critter involved. Also, big props to your hubby for not hesitating to throw the trash out before shit got really weird.

    I hope there are many bourbons, and bottles of wine in your future!

    xx
    Helen

    02.29.16Reply
  37. Erica says:

    I’m not feeling the racial implications here. I’m not going to “so sorry this happened” you while ignoring that. To be fortunate enough to be able to afford a nanny is coming from an extreme place of privilege. I find it completely unnecessary to mention that you “paid her extremely well” as if you were doing her a favor. She takes care of your kid. That’s what you’re supposed to do. Also not feeling how you’ve armchair diagnosed this Latin woman as a psycho just because she wanted your man. A woman wanted your man. She sent him a text to see if he’d take the bait. He didn’t End of story. You won’t be the first or last this happens to. And please miss me w/the “I was ready to take my earrings off” bit. Stop trying to appropriate Black women. This read as a “Look at what my Latin help did to me. I’m such a victim” tale for your equally white readers/friends. It sucks and I’m sorry I can’t muster up any sympathy here.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Angela says:

      Thank you! I totally agree. #privileged

      02.29.16Reply
    • Alice says:

      It’s OK for us to sympathize with her… She had someone trying to entice her husband into cheating on their marriage… and as people reading her story isn’t it a natural thing for us to feel bad for that and sympathize with her?
      Also her tone when she mentioned that she pays her very well… I took it much more as a statement of they tried to make sure she was happy working for them and they take care of her so she would be happy and they would have a mutual respect for each other…just food for thought.
      Also being “privileged” is not a bad thing ….nor is being a “white privilege woman” something she should have to apologize for.

      02.29.16Reply
    • Jamie says:

      Privileged, yes. All the other racial crap you brought into this is you. Purely YOU.

      03.01.16Reply
      • amelia says:

        Exactly! The nanny’s ethnicity was only ever mentioned by the nanny herself – in the form of the text she inappropriately sent to the husband!

        03.01.16Reply
  38. Sarah says:

    A person in your home, who is to have a relationship with your child is a sacred thing. Any dishonesty would be grounds for dismissal in my opinion. There is no room for error when it comes to your children. It’s so nice that you and your husband are on the same page with that!
    Not that this will help for that kind of weird and shady BUT…in CA there is a program called Trustline (trust line.org), it was created for in home care givers by a mother who’s baby had a terrifying and traumatic experience with a nanny and it changed her life forever. It is a way to finger print (livescan) a potential nanny. Those fingerprints are then run through the FBI and DOJ. Many nanny agencies claim that they finger print, but they never actually run the prints! This gives some piece of mind, at least it did for me. Hope that helps weed out some of the crazies for you! Good luck in your search for a new nanny, or as I call ours, my third arm 🙂

    02.29.16Reply
  39. Stace says:

    Oh wow, so proud of your husband! Most men would have called for those types of shenanigans (aka Jude Law, Arnold, Ben, etc…)

    02.29.16Reply
  40. Christine says:

    Wow this restored my faith in husband kind. He’s a good one Eva.

    02.29.16Reply
  41. Lara says:

    Ho Lee Shitballs!

    Shitty people SUCK!

    (((Hugs)))
    From Detroit

    02.29.16Reply
  42. Amanda Robinson says:

    WHERE do I even begin! Jaw dropped as well. Can’t believe this is real. Some people are strait whack. Way to be awesome and to tell this story!

    02.29.16Reply
  43. Susan says:

    Everyone makes mistakes. This is something that should have been handled by the three of you and not posted on a blog or us weekly. So trashy and immature. No matter how bad someone messed up, there is no need to tell the whole world. Makes me sad. Some of these blogs are out of control. Hopefully you have other material to talk about instead of gossiping about other people’s mistakes for the whole world to see. Maybe not.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Stephanie Lorenzo says:

      A mistake is forgetting your keys, not trying to have sex with someone else’s husband, and if you don’t like the post then don’t read the blog. It’s that simple.

      02.29.16Reply
  44. Toni M says:

    Hello,
    I am new to your blog and I saw this post on Perez Hilton. I am sorry you and your husband had to go through this….women do way too much. What happened to the time when women respected another woman’s home and family? All I can say is this….begone trash begone. You are lucky to have her out of your life. Please report her to whatever service you used so she can not secure another position in a high profile home. Be blessed!

    Toni

    02.29.16Reply
  45. Kristyn says:

    Wow if I lived by you I would nanny for you, minus the flirting with the husband, that’s just so wrong. She obviously has no self respect. I’ve been nannying for years and sure, a dad may be cute, but that’s just sick. Go Team Kyle and Eva!

    02.29.16Reply
  46. Jessie says:

    I was just talking to my husband last night about how I am not afraid that he’d ever cheat on me, because he wouldn’t, but I knew opportunities would present themselves and I just wished they wouldn’t. I cannot imagine how violated that made you feel. Your husband handled it beautifully, but it’s a shame you have this story. Hugs.

    02.29.16Reply
  47. Jill A. Jones says:

    Good luck finding another one, keep your head up and I hope you don’t freeze on the East coast.

    02.29.16Reply
  48. karen says:

    you seem like you’d be the BIGGEST nightmare to work for. lol

    02.29.16Reply
    • Stephanie Lorenzo says:

      How? Because she won’t let her nanny bang her husband?

      02.29.16Reply
    • Kristin says:

      Thank you Stephanie! My God! I held my nannies to high standards because they were caring for my babies and the minute she betrayed that trust that bitch was gone and never got paid! If you know how to do your job right and you are a loyal loving and trustworthy provider who focuses on the job and only the job instead of focusing on being a two timing piece of trash and a whore then pretty sure it would be a pleasant experience that paid very well!

      03.01.16Reply
  49. Stephanie Lorenzo says:

    Oh my Eva that’s terrible! Karma is a bitch and she’ll get what’s coming to her! I’m glad Kyle didn’t betray you and Marlowe, but sad that now you have no nanny AGAIN! I’m actually a part time babysitter for 2 little girls of a family friend, I’ve watched them since they were infants, they’re now 7 and 4, and I know how much of a handful they can be, and you need someone reliable and trustworthy! I’m in Philly but if you’re ever here with Marlowe and you need someone, I’m available! I have my own car, I’ll come to you, I have an excellent reference and as an avid follower of your blog, I know your struggles and would love to help if you ever need me!

    02.29.16Reply
  50. Lori Sanchez says:

    I am a seasoned Emergency Manager with over 20 years of experience with a Federal security clearance, Masters degree from a prestigious Southern California university, happily married woman for over 20 years. I have always wanted to be a teacher and care for children, and now that my 3 girls have graduated from college, maybe it’s time for that career change. Please contact me if you are reviewing resumes. I can guarantee you, I will not go after your husband! 🙂 I am a great cook too!

    02.29.16Reply
  51. Erissa says:

    You and your husband are #RelationshipGoals.. Lol. I know corney. But still the audacity of this women to come into YOUR home and disrespect you the way she did is mind boggling to me. I know women like her exist but I will NEVER understand them. You handled it better than I would have because I would have gone New York on her ass!!!! And the fact that she used your child in her scheme pisses me off even more!!!! Anyways this was a great post. Really enjoyed it. First time on your blog and I definitely subscribed. Can’t wait for more!

    02.29.16Reply
  52. Teri says:

    Okay I am speechless- trash just took on a whole new meeting. If that text was her idea of “having fun” I sure hope she never ever has another job watching kids. Good grief. Happy to see it all worked out well for you 3:)

    02.29.16Reply
    • Teri says:

      Meeting=meaning

      02.29.16Reply
  53. Kathy says:

    ran across this on my FB. And as one happily married mommy to another, all I could think was , Girl! my DD and I will come over there and hang with your DD until you can get it figured out. Except that I’m Nor Cal. So, we’re here for you in spirit.

    02.29.16Reply
  54. Jennifer says:

    On behalf of reputable nannies, like myself, I am so sorry! There are those of us with integrity. I won’t even take a job if I think the husband is cute in any way shape or form, because I don’t even want to be putting that kind of vibe out there, even subconsciously.
    I hope you find the person that compliments your family beautifully & has no interest in creating drama.

    02.29.16Reply
  55. Nathalie says:

    So you hired two strangers to take care of your precious daughter and you are surprised by the outcome? What a world we live in. We choose our careers before our family. Because it’s all about being super women. Your daughter will not be a toddler forever. Silly how you feel like someone’s wronged you. You decided this lifestyle.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Stephanie Lorenzo says:

      Wow judgmental much? It’s totally unnecessary of you to make this comment, not everyone wants to stay home with kids all day for the rest of forever and she doesn’t have to because childcare is an option. Welcome to this century.

      02.29.16Reply
      • Julia says:

        Respectfully, yes, childcare is an option but what will this sweet baby girl remember of her childhood…a series of nannies floating in and out of your life? Sometimes having children means either the mom or dad need to make sacrifices and that would include one of them making the decision to place their child as the number one priority.

        Sure it would be great for each person to have a full-time plus career but when a child is raised by a series of nannies, maybe it’s time to reconsider. No one regardless of how much you pay them will treat your daughter as well as her parents.

        This is coming from a woman who works with children. And in my experience, children don’t remember the home with all its beautiful possessions or all the toys they’ve be given, they remember that their parents weren’t home a lot.

        So while this situation was awful, maybe it’s time to make adjustments on both schedules so that your lovely daughter can be raised by her loving parents instead of a series of nannies.

        02.29.16Reply
        • Julie says:

          Completely agree!

          There are MANY (and I mean many) full-time bloggers who stay at home with their children – that’s the basis of some of their blogs, in fact! A full-time blogger has a lot of privileges that those of us who work outside of the home do not have – the ability to make your own schedule being one of them. Even with Eva being an actress, she is able to hire child care to travel with her to sets.

          03.01.16Reply
        • Nathalie says:

          Very well said 🙂

          03.01.16Reply
  56. MamitaGomez says:

    Shut the front door.

    I’m going to have to read your blog on the regular. I don’t have cable. And obviously now I don’t need it. Sorry you were one step away from finding a bunny in your soup, but your husband knocked it out of the park. May you have many boring days ahead of you (so you can catch your breath and all), and may all your endings be happy.

    Peace out, friend.

    02.29.16Reply
  57. Kassie Gray says:

    Eva, Holy Shit! This is crazy! I am so sorry you had to go through this! Not cool at all and so disappointing. It is so hard to find good people out there. But I am not surprised by how Kyle handled it. He is one of the those good guys 😉 Kel and I hope you guys find someone trustworthy and great and hope you enjoy the extra family time together! Miss you guys!
    Kassie

    02.29.16Reply
  58. Robin says:

    Oh Eva I’m so sorry to hear that this is happening to your family. I was a nanny before I became a school teacher and I loved it! My heart aches for your family and especially for Marlowe because change isn’t easy especially for someone so young and for both you and Kyle for you guys are entrusting someone with your precious child who is the love of your life. Trust those mama and papa bear instincts. It angers me to think that someone would even think of doing something like that! My prayer for you is to find a person with integrity that you can trust and who loves working with children first and formost! I have read and enjoyed your blog from the very beginning and always thought how fun it would be to babysit Marlowe and have you as a friend! I would be her nanny in a heartbeat! Sincerly of luck to you in your nanny search. The right one is out there for you guys and keep doing the great job with Marlow and your blog!

    02.29.16Reply
  59. Kara Marks says:

    I’m so proud of your husband and for what it says about how strong your relationship is. You two sound like you’ve handled this beautifully. I pray you find someone easily who is trustworthy and capable.

    02.29.16Reply
  60. Alice says:

    👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 YAY for your Husband and how he handled it!!!!
    And man I really am so sorry you had to deal with that! I am a nanny and I take the whole Husband/Nanny “relationship ” very seriously!! As a nanny(Or any woman) YOU JUST DONT GO THERE AHHH just so awful of her!! But again I read this and was just so proud of Kyle! I hope for no more nanny drama for you!!
    Always love reading your stories about your adorable family! 💕
    Keep up the great story telling! Xoxo ~Alice

    02.29.16Reply
  61. Jessica says:

    At least the nanny has discribed herself as being undesirable to the husband. (It is a bit crazy that she already knows that about herself yet still provoked a situation that she basically already knew the outcome) You would have thought you picked a good one…

    What about the other way around, when the nanny with the early childhood degree and years of experience not to mention impeccable references, is attractive! Do you brush her application to the end of the line? To me, my work ethic and intellect trump my looks any day, but let’s be real here…Temptation is all around. Luckily I am gainfully employed and spend my days with 4girls under 4. (Cue the exhaustion) I have been with them since their twins were 18mo, who are now 4! I will say this thou…One of my biggest fears choosing to nanny(school) privetly instead of teaching in the school system was, being that I am a pretty woman,would I not get chosen or would I have issues with the husband making passes at me… Thankfully that situation has never happened to me, but a very real occurrences nonetheless.

    You picked a great Man, Good Luck with the Nanny search!!

    02.29.16Reply
  62. xoxo says:

    Holy shit! Your husband rocks. It must be so hard to trust someone to watch your daughter in the environment that you live.

    02.29.16Reply
  63. Sarah says:

    I’m sorry you’re having nanny problems, not sure why you can’t raise your child yourself especially when you’re a blogger… that should give you the flexibility to raise your child on your own with your husband. I could never trust a stranger to raise my children, that’s why I did it myself. My husband and I made sacrifices, mostly financially, in order to do that but the time I got to spend with them as they were little was soooo priceless and I don’t have to worry about a stranger doing inappropriate things to (or around) my beautifully innocent and pure children; or worrying about them being harmed or abused. Now that my kids are in school, I’ve gone back to school too. But I never let a stranger babysit either. You cannot trust people these days and your story is proof.

    02.29.16Reply
    • R says:

      Agreed. I can’t imagine ever feeling that my time was better spent blogging than parenting, but I also understand that other parents feel differently. I try not to judge others for their personal choices, but I do often find myself totally perplexed. I suppose we all live in our own little worlds, but this whole scenario honestly makes the twilight zone into play in my head.

      02.29.16Reply
    • First I would like to say you can trust people. It is a must for the soul. From time to time one will experience disappointment by the closest people to us. But that is part of living. We get wiser and hopefully even more trusting. Yes. No one should take that away. How do you trust someone? Trust them.
      I too never had anyone take care of my children except myself or my mom in law. That is what I chose. We all make choices and deserve trust in those choices by our family and people around us.
      I am an artist and I still work from home as always. I hardly ever traveled for my work. That was my choice.
      Young women today want a career and a family and they deserve ever bit of what they want and work hard to aspire for. The same understanding should be available for the young women who want to stay at home and raise their own children.
      We must trust people. It is a sad day when you let someone take away that trust. I am sorry you not to trust. It feels good to trust. Try it someday again.
      I am closer to 60 than 50 now.

      02.29.16Reply
    • Julie says:

      Agreed. As I commented above, there are many very successful bloggers who have raised their kids at home until they are school aged. Being a blogger affords you many opportunities that others (who have to work outside of the home) do not have. Especially when you are already famous in your own right and then start a blog, you have an instant following that others do not have.

      03.01.16Reply
  64. Mariana says:

    Well, I’m a Stanford-educated writer who is very happily engaged and would love to be a part-time nanny. I live in LA.

    02.29.16Reply
  65. Stephy says:

    I think the only thing sadder than the fact that this woman made a move on your husband is the fact that people are acting surprised that he fired her! I mean, her job would have put her in close proximity to him on a daily basis. If she made a blatant sexual advance on him, what else was he supposed to do? He had to handle it himself, or she would have thought it was just you being a controlling bitch. It’s the only way it could have played out. I feel bad for the women whose husbands wouldn’t have managed a situation that way.

    02.29.16Reply
  66. I have always worked from home and never had anyone but my mom in law as a optional caregiver.
    I think having a more mature (older) caregiver might be in order. Someone whom has already cared for their children and or grandchildren. Older caregivers were more sought after with my friends.
    I do hope this woman has learned a lesson.
    Your search will be hard for a replacement. Trusting again might not be easy, but it is necessary.

    Diane Keiser

    02.29.16Reply
  67. Jon Shecket says:

    It’s no surprise that Kyle is a class act because he ALWAYS has been. Back in the days when he played here in Columbus, the players were kind of forced to be accessible to the fans to an extent that was really fun for us at the time but in retrospect seems cozy to a fault. That meant you could really get a feeling for who the good guys were. He took it all in stride, and was never anything but a gentleman. Anyway, this story clinches it… You are the best Hollywood couple (p.s. I LOVED you in Saved!).

    02.29.16Reply
  68. Belle Day says:

    Dear Eva,
    While I understand your wanting to share your story, victimizing yourself and your husband, bullying and shaming your former nanny and engaging in racial profiling by publicly sharing your nanny’s ethnicity seems unkind. I do not understand what you aim to accomplish in sharing your nanny’s bad choice? Was she an unkind, unreliable nanny? Did she ever mistreat your child? I think instead of seeking commiseration from your blog followers, perhaps you should call on your compassion and stop trying to make yourself out to be a person that has never made a mistake. Your husband’s actions in this regard do not seem to make him a “legend”. He sounds loyal albeit a bit kowtowed . All human beings are flawed. Your story is sadly another example of a white privileged, first world problem. Perhaps, have empathy for your nanny instead of publicly shaming and bullying her? Just food for thought.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Alli says:

      I think you have forgotten the purpose behind a blog…it’s to journal and share with people, your life. The good, bad and ugly. From my point of view she wasn’t asking for our sympathy or validation, she never stated she was perfect…she was connecting with people by sharing a traumatic situation that happened in her life.
      I think you may need to reaccess the blogs you follow and stick to those that are about rainbows, long hugs, sunshine and seeing everything through rose colored glasses.

      03.01.16Reply
      • Alli says:

        *reassess

        03.01.16Reply
  69. Jen Lee (@hellpinghand) says:

    Well, I think your husband handled the situation with a lot of honesty and class. Having said that, I have been a nanny for many years. There is usually a nanny network of friends or at least one good nanny friend that we talk to. Not for a minute do I believe that nanny intended for your husband to receive that text! We all say raunchy and inappropriate things to our true blue friends. So it’s unfortunate that he accidentally received the text. She probably did find your husband attractive (and from the photo, most women would find him handsome), and so what? He is!! As far as her being in your bedroom….she may have been checking to see if you returned or if the husband was back….no big deal. The true sad part is that she may have been a loving, dependable, and sweet nanny for your daughter.

    02.29.16Reply
  70. Tracy says:

    Yeah right, a doll house dream she was on. I’m impressed your husband was so ready to face the elements of a high profile family. I’m really happy you were willing to talk about this. And I love you two were both ready to put down the guns and let her go her way with no hard feelings. Your marriage is a treasure to keep.xo I hope you can find a better person to replace her and care for your daughter with kindness and love that includes the parents.

    02.29.16Reply
  71. Cat says:

    Yikes Eva! I wouldn’t blame you if you never hired a nanny again. I’ve been blessed with amazed nag child care for my daughters and I’m so sorry this has happened to you all. And not once but twice. Enjoy your time with your family. Looking forward to your new adventures.
    Xo
    Cat

    02.29.16Reply
  72. Courtney says:

    Wow. I’m am so sorry. You are so blessed to have an incredible husband! Wish you the best on the east coast for a while! I’m sure it’ll be a good change for a bit!

    02.29.16Reply
  73. Ginny says:

    Love your work as an actress and will now follow your blog. Very down to earth and actually, you both took the high road. Well done you two!

    02.29.16Reply
  74. MOD says:

    Other people want what you have. I guess that happens when there is such inequality in the world. One of the downsides…

    Your husband is very handsome and seems like a nice guy who is committed to his family – you’re lucky, and he is too!

    Have a lovely life.

    02.29.16Reply
  75. Mike says:

    YOU GOT A GOOD MAN GURLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!

    02.29.16Reply
  76. jen says:

    Raise your own kids, problem solved.

    02.29.16Reply
  77. Deb says:

    So I’m reading some of the replies on this post and they make me literally Laugh Out Loud. Some people want to know why you don’t “care for your daughter yourself,” after all, “you’re a blogger” who “stays at home.” Others think you were overreacting with the whole situation. Some think you’re being racist, while others think you’re being #privileged. While I don’t normally do this, I’d love to reply because I’ve been a nanny for a great deal of my life and I’d love for people to see the situation from a nanny point of view — and not just yours.
    For a working parent, working IN the home is just as difficult as it is working outside of the home, if not more so. Let me explain: Working in the home means you can hear your child throughout the day. The good, the bad and the ugly! When they’re tired and cranky, upset, crying and in need of their mom or dad is an especially difficult time because while the parent is trying to work, their instincts are going to drive them towards their child and they become distracted and end up not getting a whole lot of work done. So, as much as people would like to say, “Oh, you work from home, take care of your baby yourself — NEWSFLASH: It doesn’t work that way! In addition, no parent should be made to feel like they are less of a parent because they have childcare! If they worked outside of the home it’s ok to have childcare but otherwise, they’re less of a parent or something? On the contrary, I think that the fact that they are home allows them the flexibility to see their child a little more often than if they were outside of the home, and that can only be good for the child – and for nannies that have an agenda of sleeping with their boss! See, had you been working from HOME, you wouldn’t have had to worry about your nanny trying to sleep with your husband and you might’ve been able to get more work done knowing your NANNY was doing the job she’d been hired to do – taking care of your daughter.
    It especially made me Laugh Out Loud when people said you were overreacting. Ummmm, I’m just trying to think of how many women would take it in stride when their nanny sends their husband a text message similar to the one your husband received AND THEN CATCHES THE NANNY IN YOUR BEDROOM. Let’s let that sink in. How is that an overreaction???? Let us all remember that you hired this woman to care for your daughter, you trusted her with your most precious possession in the entire world! She violated that trust starting with that text message, but to catch her in your bedroom – that was just another step forward in her plan — because YES, she clearly had a plan! Whoever thinks there is room to overreact here clearly has no boundaries themselves. The way I see it, firing her and writing this blog post was a nice thing to do in this situation. Ya could’ve put her name out there and made sure she never tried to break up any other families out there!
    I’m wondering HOW you were racist in your post? Was it because you said your nanny was Latin? Because I’m pretty sure she stated that in her text message to your husband ALL ON HER OWN! Just stating the obvious here.
    #Privileged. LOL. I don’t understand how having a nanny makes you privileged. Many people have a nanny or a babysitter. Whether they are rich, middle class or poor doesn’t matter. I have been a nanny for many diverse sets of families – some made more money than others. BELIEVE ME – the privilege is that of the nanny who has a job working with these incredible little people. They get to love and help nurture our future generations and ensure THEY have all the privileges growing up in this cruel world. They get to teach them and help shape who they become in this world. Having a nanny is NOT a privilege. It’s a the nanny who has the privilege and the ones like her make it difficult for the rest of us to be trusted to do our jobs to the best of our abilities.
    SO – from a nanny point of view – I don’t see anything wrong with you having a nanny, posting this blog, nor do I think you’re “overreacting” or #privileged. I think you made the best decision you could based on the information you had for the safety of your little girl and the sanctity of your marriage – and there’s NOTHING wrong with that.

    02.29.16Reply
    • Donna says:

      👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

      03.01.16Reply
      • Donna says:

        Very well said !

        03.01.16Reply
    • EF says:

      You are delusional. No one will ever love your babies the way you do. No one. Maybe grandparents if they are like my mom and dad who are completely obsessed with my kids. If you can’t handle the realities of having kids and a job, “the good the bad and the ugly”, then you shouldn’t have had kids. It’s not their fault your career is more important, they didn’t ask to be born. NEWSFLASH: Kids want and need to be raised by their parents. Not loads of in and out strangers. That goes for anyone with any kind of job. Your children are first, and if your work will take you away from them that much that you need someone else to raise them, then having children is NOT for you. This is from a full time working Mom of three. My husband and I work differnt hours, and if the time overlaps a bit, they have grandma and grandpa. Kids should not be raised by daycares and nannies, and the parents deep down know this. Welcome to why the kids are so bad nowadays everyone. Being ignored or watching their parents put their careers and personal lives first. What a shame. Shout out to the many many people nowadays choosing not to have children because they know they can’t give them the attention they’ll need, and to the Moms and Dads who find a way to put the kids first while still being able to put in the career… just in second place. That nanny SHOULD have been fired, and never replaced. Haha her husbands reply cracked me up. “Honey, don’t panic, but we might need to actually raise our daughter that WE created and WE brought into the world ourselves for a few weeks..” Now that’s laugh out loud.

      03.02.16Reply
  78. klm says:

    Why don’t you take care of your child rather than farming her out to another person? The blame is with you and your husband. None of these posts would be sympathetic stories for your website without your decision to employ a nanny. What is more important- your commitment to your child or your need to be busy? Ask your daughter when she is in elementary school, middle school and college who she would have liked to have spent her mornings, afternoons and nights with. Her family or an employee/ several paid people to take care of her.

    02.29.16Reply
    • klm says:

      It’s sad and discouraging that a comment I thoughtfully considered and honestly believe as a mother, a former nanny and having been raised by babbysitters/ nannies, is replied to “your comment is awaiting moderation.”

      It would seem only sympathetic and encouraging comments are allowed on your website. A differing view might not be invited. “Comments” are an opening for discourse.

      02.29.16Reply
    • DMC says:

      You are completely out of line. Many children have babysitters and nannies because their mothers have to or choose to work. I believe that children are happiest when their parents are also happy. Not every mother wants to be a stay at home mother and this does not make them bad people or bad mothers. I am so sick of women judging other women based on their personal parental choices.

      03.01.16Reply
    • Andrianna says:

      I don’t think it is fair to blame the parents for the actions of a third party whom they trusted enough to leave with their child. Women have the right to work and be mothers. Why should Eva be faulted for attempting to grow her blog and make an even better life for her offspring? What right do we have to tell her how to parent her own child? If you follow Eva’s instagram and or blog, you will see that she spends a lot of time with Marlowe. It isn’t like she casts her to the side and is a hands off parent by any means. To say that the nanny throwing herself at Kyle is Eva and Kyle’s fault is totally out of line and uncalled for. Put yourself in their shoes. Would you like to be blamed? Hang in there Eva!

      03.01.16Reply
    • Kristin says:

      Farming her out klm???? Farming… thats the word you chose to use as if to imply that her daughter is some sort of an animal with no meaning to her whatsoever! Judgemental c*nts like you make my skin crawl for real! I work from home and had a nanny for a long time while I was building my business. I also worked in TV production and had a nanny while I worked outside the home. Either way I was there when my kids took their first steps, said their first words, all their activities, etc.. and we were able to give our children a better life. Ever think that the choice of two parents working isn’t just for their gain but also for the childs? Since I also worked and do still also work I am able to use my husbands income for bills and savings and mine for our entertainment, clothes, other things that may be needed, extracurriculer activities (for instance my son wanted to play hockey which is not cheap at all so I can afford to do that on top of martial arts, acting class, soccer, t ball, dance and gymnastics for my daughter, and more) and guess what… I AM AT EVERYTHING! NEVER MISSED A THING! But parents or “moms” that work are farming their kids and are piece of shit parents right? I feel sorry for your kids! I bet they hate you!

      03.01.16Reply
      • stephanie says:

        Wow!!!!! You sound like a horrible person… and it also sounds you HATE your life!!!! Ha…. Good luck you little CUNT!

        03.03.16Reply
  79. dj says:

    Awful. You might want to change your phone numbers since that trashy woman has both of them and may feel vindictive.

    Don’t listen to the idiots on here who feel sorry for the nanny. Unbelievable.

    02.29.16Reply
  80. Mike hunt says:

    Wow. What a trashy person. Glad it all ended well for you & family though. Things are easy to fix when you’re rich.

    02.29.16Reply
  81. Jessica says:

    While it’s unfortunate this happened and she should not have done that or acted that way, and you have a right to be angry, calling her a “psycho” says more about you than it does her and trivializes people who suffer from actual psychosis. She’s a person who made a bad choice, not some insane person with an evil vendetta who deserves to be demonized. She’s a young adult who had a crush on her boss and had sexual feelings for him, and acted in a the wrong way. She’s a person who needs to learn that her actions have consequences (which she did by losing her job), and your husband treated her with respect while still letting her go. You could learn something from that interaction. There are also a lot of people who, when confronted, clam up from embarrassment and can’t think of any words, and then later freak out. Saying that she didn’t try to defend herself in a frantic manner makes her guilty of sending the text on purpose isn’t proof.

    02.29.16Reply
  82. Nas says:

    I know your nanny is of the Latin persuasion, but could she have been Rebecca De Mornay in disguise, lol #TheHandThatRockstheCradle

    But in all honesty this was a blessing in disguise. A true test of fidelity and trust. This is not a sad moment, this is a joyous time. You’re husband handle the situation in the right manner. His actions reassured his devotion to you and to your family. Bravo to him! This is a story all should read and learn from.

    02.29.16Reply
  83. Jillian says:

    Oh wow! That is quite the story! As absolutely horrible as this unfortunate event was, I’m so relieved for you and your family, knowing it could have had a way worse outcome. It seems like your family is truly a blessed one. Your husband did the right (and incredibly SMART) thing. And hey, if you still want a nanny I would be more than happy to offer my services! Lol. I am 26 years old, so I have the energy to keep up with youngins, can cook almost anything, children seem to like me ALOT (I also have experience in childcare), possess an impeccably clean record, and am a licensed barber-stylist, so if you all need a haircut or cute style I can gladly oblige. I also identify as asexual so you can trust me to not to try to get into your man’s pants!!! Hahaha.

    03.01.16Reply
  84. Rebecca says:

    How hot was she have you ever considered a threesome to spice things up a bit ? I am going to try one with my fiancee just a suggestion god bless xoxo

    03.01.16Reply
  85. Meg noblesavage says:

    Lol. After reading this, it is apparent that you really don’t need a nanny.. If you have got time to text and gossip and write a blog.. about basically nothing, I am pretty sure you can watch your daughter. I am a single mother, attend grad school, and work. And as for the nanny situation, seems like you are brutally bragging about the fact that your husband fired the nanny over a sexual text message. Plus, there are always two sides to every story.

    03.01.16Reply
  86. Anonymous says:

    What an awful thing for your family to have to go through! I can’t even imagine how someone could be so disrespectful, mind blown! I hope the East Coast treats you well and you all are able to enjoy your time together!

    (Random side note suggestion: former Staples Alum Vanessa Wauchope – now Welstead – founded the hugely successful Sensible Sitters and may be able to help you find a quality nanny! Good luck!)

    03.01.16Reply
  87. Sarah says:

    Wow, so anticlimactic! I just found the story on Yahoo and clearly it was a huge let down. He confronted her, fired her, she left….big deal. I am pretty sure YOUR OWN nannies wanted Tim Robbins more, but whatever.

    03.01.16Reply
  88. big O says:

    She was on the heavy side that’s why he didn’t take the bait. If she was a smoking hot nanny like the ones in the scandals he would have went for it. This isn’t a story most guys would have done the same to a overweight girl and claimed they did it because they love their wife so much. Give me a break.

    03.01.16Reply
    • stephanie says:

      you sound smart. smh lol… give me a break!

      03.03.16Reply
  89. NotMe says:

    Hate to tell you this, but “disorientated” is not a word. It’s “disoriented” in the context in which you used it. In another context, it might be “disorientation”. Not trying to be a grammar cop or anything, but “disorientated”, “conversated” and similar non-words are daggers to my heart and I feel the need to correct them when I see or hear them.

    03.01.16Reply
  90. Nanny Kimbo says:

    Truly horrific! I have worked as a nanny for 8 years or so and this is so beyond inappropriate! Nannies are often portrayed as wily home wreckers who seduce husbands and this woman was clearly just that! Fortunately, we’re not all like that! If I interviewed with a parent that I was sexually attracted to, I simply wouldn’t take the position. I take my job incredibly seriously and am fully aware of the level of trust afforded to me by the parents that I work for. I hope that you manage to find a replacement for your daughter and that this trauma doesn’t cause you to view nannies in a harsh light. Thankfully, nannies like that are in the minority!

    03.01.16Reply
  91. SP says:

    Chicks are crazy. At every age.

    03.01.16Reply
  92. Trish Holley says:

    Eva,
    I am so sorry you and your family had to experience this. I am thirty five years old and have been a Nanny for sixteen years and as a mother of two daughters, I find this extremely inappropriate. I applauded your husband for taking immediate action. Just so you know, Not all Nannies are like this. I understand how hard it is to put your faith and trust in someone who looks after your precious daughter and for it to be broken is saddening. I hope you’re able to find someone who meets all of your qualifications and more.

    03.01.16Reply
  93. Veronica says:

    Wow! That is beyond disturbing. You all are strong and beautiful family, I truly hope the next nanny will be professional and do the job they are hired to do, care and tend to you precious little girl. Good luck and I’m so glad to see a healthy & honest marriage being spotlighted 🙂 <3

    03.01.16Reply
  94. Lauren R. says:

    Watch out- Lifetime might be calling to make this into a movie! Congrats to you on your wonderful relationship with your husband. Love this blog!

    03.01.16Reply
  95. Tania says:

    You’re awesome. Your husband is awesome, and is it terrible that I wish this story had a P.S. that involved the teenager who came of age in Brooklyn?

    03.01.16Reply
  96. beth says:

    I think it’s sad that race has even been brought into this dialogue. The only reason we know the nanny was Hispanic was from the text that was sent. People need to stop playing this card and understand that boundaries were crossed and trust was broken. The ultimate job of a nanny is to keep a child safe and provide for their wellbeing. In my opinion, this nanny definitely didn’t earn her pay for the day, but this couple was nice enough (and smart enough!) to pay for the services due. Have the commenters who are trying to play the class warrior card ever heard of blackmail? People who are wealthy get taken advantage of as well… Is being a gentleman and loving your wife and family so unheard of these days? Kudos to this couple for doing the right thing and being a great role model for families everywhere. Maybe if this happens enough, women (and men) will stop pursuing people who are already married, because it is simply self-centered and frankly immoral.

    03.01.16Reply
  97. Molly says:

    So sorry this happened to you. I just found your blog about a month ago and have been reading it. You are not only a great actress, wife and mother, but a great blogger. I love your content. I love how your husband took care of the situation. Girl, you have a great and wonderful man on your hands. Never let him go. I don’t know what happened with the first nanny but getting rid of the 2nd one before things escalated was the right thing to do. I am sure you will figure something out for Marlowe. Remember, there is always family. Keep doing what you are doing.

    03.01.16Reply
  98. Happy for You says:

    I’m so sorry this happened to you. I had the opposite thing happen. My husband (we were not married yet) had a woman friend with five children. She was having substance abuse problems, and ended up in treatment several times. Each time she went away we would take one of her children for two to four weeks at a time. I absolutely adored this child, and would have her over to bake cookies, take her out shopping to buy her clothes, and go out on little excursions. My bond with her lasted for a half dozen years. After the birth of my second child I got a call from the child’s mother telling me she slept with my husband during the time I was caring for her daughter. She said she as making the call because he was cheating on me with another woman, and she “didn’t think it was right”, because I now had small children of my own. (Somehow it was okay when I was caring for hers?). To add insult to injury, on our wedding day my husband insisted that she take part in the religious part of our wedding ceremony. Unbelievable. So hug your husband and child tightly. Cheating can shatter a family. It shattered mine. It’s so nice to hear about a good and loving man.

    03.01.16Reply
  99. Cathrine says:

    Your snap today is really, really GREAT. Go for it, you working mum’s!!!

    Greetings from Norway! (and guess what – nearly no mums in Norway are home with their kids after 1 1/2 year;) – and it’s going great! Both the kids AND the mums are happy).

    03.01.16Reply
  100. I normally refrain from commenting, but then I saw your snaps and heard about the trolls and my “protect the mom!” instinct kicked in. I honestly don’t get the trolls above. You follow people in the hopes of connecting…yet there are some people who spend their time ripping people apart or saying negative shat that benefits no one. If they weren’t anonymous I’d think they just wanted their warped five minutes of fame… then I wonder if these mom shamers don’t have a voice in their own households and therefore jump at any and all chances at sharing their opinions with people who didn’t ask for it. You share your stories. Gone are the days where that’s enough. I’m sorry you have to deal with the bogus. I guess it’s the one catch to having a successful blog??? silver lining??? Glad you’re able to laugh it off. Just know there are more moms out there supporting you and relating than not. Working moms (hi.) stay at home moms…all of us FULL TIME MOMS.

    03.01.16Reply
  101. Maddie Q. says:

    As a nanny myself with over 25 years experience, this story really disappoints me. You have a great husband and seem like a really nice and fun couple. There are so many childcare givers out in the world who work SO HARD and of course those of us who are professional and great at our jobs are never spoken of. The only nannies we hear about are the nut cases like you and your husband encountered and Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner’s nanny. These people are horrible examples of people representing a very honorable profession. Nannies are not only caring for children, we are psychologists, maids, coaches, teachers, personal chefs, drivers, and emergency handlers all rolled into one job!! Most of the time, we are grossly underpaid and extremely under valued. Eva, if you ever have the good fortune to work with a great nanny someday, please write about how wonderful she is and what a difference she makes in your family’s life. It’s so disheartening to always hear the bad stuff (and don’t get me wrong! What happened to you and your husband was really BAD!!) when so many of us try so hard to bring our very best selves to work everyday. A great caregiver is out there for your family. It just takes time and thoughtful consideration to find that person!

    03.01.16Reply
  102. Delin says:

    I predict a long and happy marriage. I don’t know either of you and just happened to run across this blog, but the level of honesty, trust, respect and, of course, love that is evident in this account is so much greater than many marriages ever attain. Your husband seems to be loyal, sweet, communicative and madly in love with you. You show yourself (despite your initial Brooklyn reaction) to be a secure, mature woman, blessed with a sense of perspective that allows you to see even unpleasant events through a humorous lens.
    You are both incredibly blessed, as is your daughter (love the name, Marlowe!) I would offer to watch Marlowe myself (wink) but I couldn’t possibly leave my own knight who has been my devoted champion and best friend for 35+ years. Carry on… and best wishes.

    03.01.16Reply
  103. Dave says:

    and who’s to say that she didn’t have her recorder running hoping to get some untoward behavior she could use to extort him with? In this day age of potential sureptitiously recorded everything, it’s in everybody’s business to be as above board as possible.

    03.01.16Reply
  104. A supporter says:

    Wow, I am so thankful that your husband trusted his instincts and handled it so wisely.

    I chose to trust my own instincts and leave my career to stay home with my children. I have had so many working women treat me like they are better than I. Some have even flirted with my husband right in front of me or told me that I am not pretty enough to keep my husband. Marriage is not sacred to some people, and some women feel they need to communicate their superiority. It is really inane.

    I have no issues with your posting your story. It is what happened. Your husband has great instincts. You do too. Trust them. You two are the best parents for your daughter.

    May your marriage always be protected! God bless your family.

    03.01.16Reply
  105. Alli says:

    I saw your snap this morning and Im sorry you have to deal with mean moms. Even if you didn’t work, why do some women think we need to sacrifice every part of our lives to spend every moment with our children? Every person needs time for themselves, especially mamas with little ones and the fact you chose to make a successful career during a majority of that time is commendable because all of your faithful followers know you’re doing this for your family. You are such a great model for little Lowie.
    The fact you have to worry about your child AND husband makes me sick for you. I watch a little girl once a week to help out a family and as a mom, I can tell you my focus is on loving and caring for that little girl while she’s with me, NOTHING ELSE. That is my job. I feel like sometimes it takes a mom to understand how important that is…a mom with experience and grown children. A grandma even. I think that’s your sweet spot. I hope you find someone you can trust and that adores your little girl.
    BTW-you’re a rockstar and you are hands down my favorite blogger and person to follow on snap chat. Keep on keeping it real!

    03.01.16Reply
    • Maddie Q. says:

      I’ve been a nanny for 25 years and I do not have children of my own. I am married to a professional man who is a safety professional with a major corporation and I have a college education. I simply enjoy my job and feel like it’s one of the most important jobs along with (of course) moms, day care professionals, and teachers. All of which are under payed and undervalued. Why can’t we respect everyone and their choices? Moms judge each other, moms judge moms with nannies, nannies are judged as bad people or losers for their chosen profession. It’s sad. Every situation is different and it’s dangerous to make blanket statements like “only moms with their own children should be nannies.” Actually, if I had my own children at home to worry about, I really have a difficult time understanding how I could be effective with the family I work with and spend 50 to 60 hours a week with! One bad nanny does not spoil the bunch!

      03.01.16Reply
  106. Ruhi Drysdale says:

    Hello beautiful, strong and amazing family! Reading this story made me sad, also made me happy. The sad was that someone you trusted to care for your most precious soul, could betray and hurt everyone involved. Happy because you and your husband handled the situation with an amazing strength, trust and foundation that put no hesitation of what you want in your home, life and family. Very proud of Kyle for being straightforward and cutting off the situation at the root. Very proud of you for loving, trusting and speaking out about issues people find taboo. Women of all walks of life have sadly experienced sadness and mistrust, the more we stand together the stronger we become. I couldn’t imagine the heartache of having to find a trusted person for not only your child but to be appropriate with boundaries. Xo love to you and your family and praying you find a strong person who knows what a blessing a family like this can be, especially when it rubs off on other families. (Twin boys and a girl I very much understand your situation and strength)

    03.01.16Reply
  107. Mel says:

    Wow, reading some of these comments I feel like I’ve been transported back to the 1950’s! It’s hard to believe that so many women seem to be blaming Eva for this situation because she is a working mom. First of all, most of you seem to assume that she doesn’t need to work. You have no idea what her financial status is! Second of all, there are many women who truly enjoy their jobs and have worked many years to accomplish their career goals, and now they are supposed to give them up because they have a child? That’s ludicrous. Listen, I’m a teacher and have decided to stop working and stay home with my son for a few years…that’s MY choice. But that choice does not mean I’m a better mother or love my child anymore than Eva does!
    As far as the nanny is concerned, she has obviously shown that she makes bad, impulsive choices and I don’t blame Eva or Kyle one bit. I would not leave my child for one second with a person I could not trust.
    Finally, to those who feel as though Eva should not have blogged about the nanny…hello, this is a blog. She blogs about being a mother and challenges that occur in her daily life. If she hadn’t given details, we would all be mad that she didn’t tell us why she fired the nanny! You can’t have it both ways people!

    03.01.16Reply
    • Dayna says:

      LOOOVE!! -high five-

      03.01.16Reply
  108. Julia Goolia says:

    Yikes!! People are nuts, man!

    I wish I could return to my nannying ways with you guys, Marlowe is at the most fun age, she needs somebody on her level everyday! You guys do so well and it is evident that your family is your first priority, no matter what is happening!!

    It has been a few years since I had a kiddo everyday, but man, I would be knockin’ on your door, resume in hand if I lived closer! You guys deserve great, supportive, healthy childcare. Best of luck in the weeks to come! If you get desperate, there is willing help in Atlanta! Love and support to you three!
    Julia

    03.01.16Reply
  109. Lisa says:

    I’m a former career nanny who happened to work in LA. I’ve been through enough to never want to do step foot in a “Hollywood” house again. I don’t know how you are looking, but I strongly recommend you don’t go through agencies. I was always shocked at how horrible their background checks were & how they would entice (and I’m using that word on purpose) nannies to register with them so “they could work with celebrities.” They also care about one thing & one thing only (both sides): placement fee. When I got to the position of hiring extra nannies for the people I worked for, I ALWAYS looked for someone older as in mature. Children don’t need a playmate, they need a nanny. Sorry to be sexist, but I would NEVER hire a guy unless it was for an older boys & his references were amazing. Someone mature typically has excellent judgment & is doing the job because they want to work with kids . There’s a weird thought out “there” that younger nannies have more energy. If your child is a track star, and you need the nanny to run with them, maybe. But what most parents need is someone who will CARE for their child in a loving, safe, appropriate manner. Hopefully, if you are lucky, your daughter will bond with the nanny in the same healthy way you will (both of you). Don’t get jealous! Nobody can take your place! A child who has an extended circle of consistent, loving bonded relationships shows more security & does better in life. A revolving door (in this case – you guys did the right thing!) is terrible for kids, especially little ones & creates all kinds of issues. Back to what I looked for – someone involved in ongoing education and most importantly, someone who READS! There is a lot of down time as a nanny. If your nanny is someone who reads, they will sit quietly and READ. They won’t be wandering through the house, they won’t be sending inappropriate text messages to made up friends & they won’t be gossiping. They will be reading. Lastly, in hiring & keeping a nanny, remember what an incredibly intimate position this is. It’s not just a job. Treat your nanny as an extended member of your family (think Prince William’s upbringing) and express appreciation for what they do for YOU. It does take a village to raise a child and if you are willing to extend yourself (and it’s going to be hard given what you’ve already gone through), you will end up with a great nanny. If the nanny doesn’t get a chance to know you and your family’s individual culture, they will not be able to do their job in the way you want them to – the way you would do it. Let them see that. I called colleges & universities & talked to the different professors of the ECC, teaching and other departments. I asked if the professors if they had anybody who was on a second career & for permission to place an ad on their bulletin board. I found excellent, professional, wonderful people. Best advice you’ll ever get. Please follow it.

    03.01.16Reply
    • Brandy says:

      I’ve been a nanny for over 23 years. It’s nannies like that that give people pause when considering hiring a nanny. I take pride in my profession, and realize there are psychotic idiots in every field. I wish you luck in finding a good nanny.

      03.01.16Reply
  110. Yasmin says:

    Let’s be honest, the ex nanny is on here writing some of these ridiculously stupid comments defending herself and her inappropriate behavior.

    03.01.16Reply
  111. Jennifer M says:

    A lesser man would have taken the bait. You’ve got a great one. But, you already know that. Hope you find a decent nanny with morals for your sweet girl. xo

    03.01.16Reply
  112. Selma says:

    I don’t know what to say. I thought you finally found a new nanny after your first disaster and then this! Unbelievable, very inappropriate and very unprofessional. People are gross. You guys deserve better. Marlowe deserves better. Glad you shared this as it proves once again that anything can happen, to anyone at anytime. Insane! Glad you went to the East Coast, away from all this drama. Hugs to you.

    03.01.16Reply
  113. Kate says:

    I was browsing on yahoo news today and saw this story… Then I found the link to read the WHOLE thing on your site here. You and your husbands story is important to share because it happens way too often!! I live in upstate New York and I work as a nanny. I love my job very much mainly in part to not being able to have my own kids(I’m 27 so that’s a hard reality). With that being said its disgusting and heart breaking when you hear about women or men whom are paid to care and love for your kids can be so selfish and down right inappropriate. I have left jobs due to the fact that I was being hit on by the husband and as we women all know you can tell somebody something about their significant other and they don’t want to hear that shit… Right???? We as childcare providers need to get it together!!!! So I give you all the applause in the world for how you and your husband handled it. Also it makes me sad for you, it’s hard to hire someone and trust them not only with your babies but your house and family!!! I hope you have found reliable, trustworthy and honest help!! God bless you and your family!! Oh and I would of wanted to take my earrings off at first and handle business too 😉

    03.01.16Reply
  114. Crystal says:

    These women do not understand how to have RELATIONSHIPS, they just know how to steal.
    But in the end they will end up ALONE.
    Although I love to hear stories about the men that actually stand up to these women. Quality man!

    03.01.16Reply
  115. Celine Ruehl says:

    Oh my god I an so so sorry for your Family! And I think u did the right thing firing her and now taking a break!
    And I have to say that I think it’s awesome that u are working full time and be at the same time a full time mum! People don’t understand how much stress and pressure u have on your shoulders! I admire that! And having a nanny doesn’t mean than i don’t care about ur child and do nothing with it for ur child this is bullshit! U are always there for little Lowie and that is the most important thing!
    Greetings Celine!

    03.01.16Reply
  116. Kristina says:

    Change your locks and this time, go for a manny!

    03.01.16Reply
  117. Jenn says:

    Okay, I feel like I need to defend Eva here a bit. I may not 100% agree with how the situation was handled, but, that’s no reason to shame her for being a working mom who needs childcare. EVERY mom needs childcare at some point, even SAHMs. If you leave your kid with grandma for a night so you and your husband can have a date, guess what? Childcare! Also, I wonder if these same comments would be made if her husband had written the post instead? Shame on some of you, seriously.

    03.01.16Reply
    • Ryan says:

      Lets keep it real here people. The nanny’s race had nothing to do with this and those who are trying to paint a picture of Eva being from a well-to-do family and so she should have paid more is ridiculous. When you leave your child with someone you want to know that they are helping to make sure the most important person in your world is in a safe environment. Trusting your child with anyone is a big deal. The fact that this nanny had no regard or respect for Kyle and Eva as people, their marriage, or their family as a whole gives them every right to fire her on the spot. She shouldn’t have been paid at all that day! And it’s not shaming the nanny by putting this out there on a blog. She wasn’t named was she? The point of this blog is for people to share their experiences and hopefully learn from one another. I’d say this is a great learning lesson for a lot of us. Would any of you want to trust your child in the care of a woman with no respect for your family? I don’t think so. Anyone trying to defend the nanny is probably someone who has thrown themselves at married people or cheated on their partners.

      03.01.16Reply
      • Penny S. says:

        Ryan, you are absolutely right. well said!

        03.01.16Reply
      • Jenn says:

        I defended the nanny because I have had friends who are nannies and childcare providers and now how hard they work and that they make mistakes sometimes, like anyone does. Sometimes the parents, not necessarily Eva but parents in general, can demand perfection from a childcare provider when they aren’t perfect themselves. So I’m sensitive to it. I never bashed Eva, I like her, it’s why I read her blog. I just expressed my opinion.

        03.02.16Reply
  118. Jill says:

    Hi Eva,
    After hearing this nanny story I am a new fan of yours. My husband is a fan of Kyle’s and a huge fan of Premiere League soccer (go Spurs), and I called the show, which is always on TV in our house, “that annoying soccer show”. LOL. But after this, I told my husband he can watch Kyle anytime he wants, he’s a true family man!!! If you are in LA, I am offering to have my 11 year old daughter and I babysit for you for a few hours. I am a preschool teacher and have a Masters Degree in Child Dev and Early Childhood Ed., and happily married, so totally qualified! And I am glad I found your blog, I do really love it!

    03.01.16Reply
  119. Oh my goodness…what a story!! I can’t imagine how stressful that was after already having to fire one nanny! It sounds like you have one amazing hubby though. Best of luck–hopefully 3rd time will be the charm in the nanny hunt!

    Just found your blog after Tess mentioned you on hers today. Can’t wait to read more!

    03.01.16Reply
  120. Margot says:

    Eva, you are an amazing mommy. You have to go with your instinct when dealing with your kids and your family and that’s what you did. Don’t ever question that. I’m just glad you are all safe. I’m sure you will someone wonderful soon!!! Love you!!!!

    03.01.16Reply
  121. Amber says:

    While reading that I instantly felt (as a mother and WIFE) so angry for you, but so proud of your husband. Kudos to him (and you of course) for handling the situation so well and being so loyal. Glad that’s over for you!

    03.01.16Reply
  122. Tina says:

    Glad you got the bitch sorted out! Kyle is like my man, refuses to be drawn in by other women and has no idea how hot he is! But I have never been jealous, if he feels he wants to do better off he goes, I will take you to the cleaners but remain friendly, hahahaha!

    03.01.16Reply
  123. Lydia says:

    I wish You the best and if you ever in Denver Colorado we can have a fun day with my grandkids and Lowie.
    May God blessed you and your family.

    03.01.16Reply
  124. donnie says:

    As someone who is a personal friend of both Kyle and Eva, there are a few facts I’d like to share:

    1. Kyle and Eva are two of the nicest, most down-to-earth people you’ll ever meet.
    2. They are absolutely wonderful parents to Marlowe.
    3. They both work really hard and yes, they can afford a part-time nanny in order for Eva to have extra help during working hours (while Kyle is across the country).
    4. Eva decided to share her experience with others and document what happened with regards to “Nannygate 2.0.” She never asked for or demanded anyone’s sympathy. She was just simply sharing an experience for other mothers to read (and perhaps get a chuckle or two out of).
    5. Eva never revealed the horny nanny’s identity.

    That’s all you really need to know. Making assumptions about how privileged you think they are, how much money you assume they make, or what kind of people they are would be extremely imprudent of you.

    03.01.16Reply
    • Luciane Mcmahon Lui says:

      Well said no one knows the situation in depth no one has the right to judge.

      03.02.16Reply
  125. Ben says:

    I’m a little shocked to see that some people are sympathizing for the nanny and bringing race into the picture! To begin, this is a blog where Eva is open and honest about her life, the challenges of being a mom, and juggling career and family. Her honesty and openness about things good AND bad is why many of us love to read it. So for her to share an experience that happened to her family that was clearly very upsetting and scary and then be chastised for it doesn’t make sense. She didn’t identify the nanny or say anything about her race. That was something that was in the text message, not something Eva said. And nanny supporters seem to be forgetting that this was her JOB. To behave that way at any job is grounds for being fired immediately and grounds for sexual harassment at any company! And the fact that this job is such a personal one that involves taking care of someone’s child and being in their home makes this situation that much more sensitive. Behavior like that should not be tolerated and Kyle had every right to fire her on the spot. And he was very smart to record the conversation to protect himself in this situation. I would not trust someone who would show such reckless behavior either. Eva, focus on the positive. You’ve got such an amazing family and so many readers who love and support your work and look forward to all of the great posts to come!

    03.01.16Reply
    • Deborah says:

      Well said.

      03.05.16Reply
  126. Angela says:

    Wow! That is unbelievable! I’ve been working with kids for a while and that is just beyond anything I’ve ever heard about. I feel bad for your little one but I’m sure she is happy about spending extra time with her mommy and daddy.
    🙂

    03.01.16Reply
  127. Fred Mertz says:

    Your husband sounds awesome, but can he tie a really thick tie knot? Oh, wait…

    03.01.16Reply
    • stephanie says:

      Ha! Someone wishes he had Kyles knot tying skills…. smh

      03.03.16Reply
  128. Yachna says:

    I am not surprised your nanny tried this. You have a gem of a husband. This could have easily ended up differently. But I don’t understand. Why hire attractive young nannies. Why not a 65-year-old nanny 🙂

    03.01.16Reply
  129. Kevin Flynn says:

    Hang tough Eva. This stuff happens. It’s how we deal with it that makes us who we are. Kyle is a class act and demonstrated that fact in how he dealt with the situation. Unfortunately, I have heard this story before. 10 years ago my friend was hit in a “nanny scam” -where a few nannies in a small MA. town tried to lure a few Dad’s into cheating on their wives. I’m sure some of the guys went for it. Thankfully, my friend didn’t. They guys who went for it were then told to pay up or the nanny would go to the police or worse the man’s wife. The scam only fell apart when the police from the surrounding towns realized that there was a pattern of similar cases.

    03.01.16Reply
  130. EC says:

    OMG! If you haven’t thought to do it already, change all the locks (Whackadoodle may have extra copies of your keys) and get electronic surveillance of your premises so if she tries to come on you’re property you have proof. Best wishes.

    03.01.16Reply
  131. It can happend to you... says:

    Be glad you’re not in a religion that she would have been possibly become a sister wife (true story)…a text like that happened to me between my husband and his old co worker (true story) 😒

    03.01.16Reply
  132. Anna says:

    I’m curious why people even have children when they have to work such long hours and as a result leave their kids in the care of strangers for the majority of the day. I think your solution is great for the time being, but nonetheless you are so busy with your work that you don’t truly know who the person caring for your child truly is. In a world where we can only fully trust ourselves I think it’s a dangerous bargain to make. Just my thoughts — I’m just speaking from the experience of having a mom who put her job first. I would have given anything to have her there instead of my nannies.

    03.01.16Reply
    • Jenn says:

      I didn’t read that she worked “such long hours.” She said the nanny was there from 9 -6, that’s a typical schedule for most people who have full-time jobs.

      03.02.16Reply
  133. Martha says:

    Change the locks!

    03.01.16Reply
  134. Sally says:

    Hi Eva,
    I can’t believe this happened to you and your family. It is indeed difficult to find childcare for your children. But it’s also extremely difficult to find jobs in childcare due to stories like these.

    I currently as an Au Pair in Amsterdam and have been in he childcare industry for 10 years and have never come across such dishonestly and deception. I not only speak for myself but for everyone, that i know of in this business. I am deeply sorry for this experience.
    Children are my true love, if your nanny’s priority was your daughter this would have never happened.
    My only advice would be to hire someone with love for children and an educational background.

    Here in Europe they do a thorough background check a series of interviews and also you can’t apply without a BA (hons) or a MA (hons) degree. I know it ends up costing more but it’s worth it.

    Your peace of mind and trust should mean everything to your employee. Sorry for this terrible, unfortunate experience.

    03.02.16Reply
  135. Luciane Mcmahon Lui says:

    Why then not screen her hired help more thoroughly next time granted Mrs. Amurri is not responsible for the actions of her Nanny however is the kind of situation that could have easily been avoided had she screened that person correctly. My apologies for the awkward situation you have experienced in any case.

    03.02.16Reply
    • stephanie says:

      Screening help will not stop anything from happening… and I bet Eva screens everyone that works for her. That just goes to show you you have to be extra cautious. I applaud them for handling this situation correctly!

      03.03.16Reply
  136. Conscious Thinker says:

    I’m sorry that you and your family had to go through this horrifying event. I also understand and realize that you are just sharing your experience with your audience. Coming from a single parent mother(not by choice) of three children taking care of them on my own with no type of support from my family or estranged husband, it boggles my mind as to why you can’t just stay at home with your daughter and take care of her. Both you and your husband make good money and come from a privileged background where you don’t have to want for anything. I stayed home and took care of them until they were 2 years old and could go into a childcare center and school. And when they got into school they were so advanced for their age in reading and math because I taught them at home. I work full time to take care of my children alone and at the end of the day, I may be tired and winded, but have the comfort of having them safe. We all as parents parent differently. I get that. But someone of your statue I just can’t relate to as childcare comes to play.

    03.02.16Reply
    • M C says:

      Dear Conscious Thinker,

      It sounds to me like you just want someone to pat you on the back **sends virtual pat**. Your experience and life circumstances have nothing to do with Eva and her family. That’s GREAT that you were able to make the choice to stay with your kids until they were 2 because that’s obviously what you felt was best for your family, just like Eva is making decisions as to whats best for hers. You say that you can’t relate to Eva’s childcare choices and that’s totally fine. What’s not OK is you leaving a comment on her blog SHAMING her for those choices when you have no idea what her day to day life is like. You are being judgmental towards not only another mom, but any mom that chooses differently than what makes sense to you. I find that to be truly “mind boggling”.

      03.03.16Reply
  137. Nathalie says:

    As a Nanny and a married woman, I find what your former Nanny did and tried to do disgusting and despicable.

    I cannot imagine ever thinking that it would be acceptable to try to seduce another woman’s husband and the thought alone makes my skin crawl.

    Your husband and you handled the situation with grace and partnership and I have no doubt that you are raising a strong and confident little girl ( I love her name by the way), because you and your husband are strong and united as her parents. Blessings to your family!

    ~N

    03.02.16Reply
  138. Deborah says:

    Hi Eva,
    I’ve been a lifelong fan of your mother’s, who remains one of the most intelligent, beautiful actresses in Hollywood. As a Latina, I am embarrassed that the woman who tried to cause you and your husband harm was also a Latina. 🙁
    Deborah

    03.02.16Reply
  139. You go girl! Stand by your man and good thing he’s standing by his family!

    03.02.16Reply
  140. Taryn says:

    I’ll babysit for you on weekends! I work full time in NYC as a preschool teacher on the weekdays but I’d be happy to care for your daughter on the weekends while you’re here!
    Best,
    Taryn

    03.02.16Reply
  141. Mad props to Kyle for how he handles this. It’s so funny to me how chicks try to pull stuff like this and don’t get how obvious they are being about it. I have no doubt this was something she’d done before- and it had worked. The silver lining of it is that now you get to spend more time together as a family. And that’s always a good thing!

    03.02.16Reply
  142. bwalker says:

    Speaks volumes about your marriage and husband – may God continue to bless your marriage!!

    03.02.16Reply
  143. Allison says:

    Some people are so pathetic and void of any moral compass, but when you’re in NYC this happily married stay-at-home- (unless she’s at CrossFit)-wife and mother of one teenager, (and auntie to many), is available, and very flexible for a reasonable fee.

    03.02.16Reply
  144. Lela says:

    I hope your husband took the house key from her when she was fired. The only thing worse than a psycho is a psycho with a key to your house! Better yet, change the locks!

    03.02.16Reply
  145. Christine says:

    Wow, what a crazy story! You’d think this would only happen in the movies! Lol. I love you’re writing, very gripping and funny as well! You’re husband is pretty amazing for not falling for that shit and for being loyal and honest. He’s a keeper! 😉

    Hope things have worked out looking for another Nanny and hope it doesn’t happen again!

    Good Luck!

    03.02.16Reply
  146. Ida Hernandez-Soliz says:

    There is always a snake in the trees. First of all, respect for your husband for handling the situation the way he did. Next, I hope you don’t lose faith in people, there are good nannies out there and I hope you find her or him. I hope you find the perfect person to care for your precious cargo. May God bless your wonderful marriage and family.

    03.02.16Reply
  147. Susan says:

    I used to dislike my name, Susan. So bland and uncommon at least where I grew up, Queens, NY. When I was younger (I’m 26 now by the way) I must have watched one of your mom’s movies, can’t remember which one but I do remember thinking she was so beautiful, graceful and regal and then to find out we had the same name made me see my name in a “Susan Sarandon” light. She is still such a gorgeous lady, she’s definitely my spirt animal. Anyways, my point is you’re just as gorgeous as she is, I don’t know what this ill-bred dimwit was thinking. You’re Susan Sarandon’s daughter there is no competition! She needs to stay in her lane or better yet sidewalk bahahahaha I can not.

    03.03.16Reply
  148. DENNISE says:

    Oh my! I wish i could beat her butt for you! What a disrespectful, non moral human being. I won’t hire a nanny, I’m a stay at home mom. If i ever have too, she will be old with a bunch of cameras in the house!

    03.03.16Reply
  149. Katy says:

    I still don’t understand why her husband would still leave his daughter with that nanny. Very dangerous situation regardless how busy with work you are.

    03.03.16Reply
  150. AlliJB says:

    Ack!!!! As a former nanny, this story makes me absolutely cringe. I am so sorry that you had to experience this (AGAIN!) and yet like you shared, it brings to light what a great partnership you enjoy with your husband. Enjoy New York! Can’t wait to hear about all of your adventures.

    03.03.16Reply
  151. Pam says:

    Despite what ANY woman thinks… It is NEVER Gods will for ANYONE to pursue someone else’s husband. PERIOD. (As I have mentored many women in my church thru marriage issues, I remind them…COMMUNICATION… COMMUNICATION… GOOD JOB YOU TWO!!! What a precious gift your husband gave you and your sweet little girl.

    03.04.16Reply
  152. Brigítte says:

    This kind of “nanny” is exactly what makes it so hard to get a good paying long term nanny position anymore. I’ve poured my heart and soul into my charges for 18 years, navigating the choppy waters the mother-nanny relationship time and again. I’ve seen some great and beautiful marriages and I have watched some dissolve before my eyes– Not one having to do with me. Not every woman wants what mommy has believe it or not, but stories like these lead one to believe that if we are not abusing your children, then we are sleeping with your husbands while wearing your good pearls.
    No one pens any stories about how nannies are vital to the career mom. Who ensures bobby’s perfect on-time attendance at activities or helps sally’s troubles with the mean girls at school? Bed wetting and pacifiers? Picking and preparing organic baby food from whole foods? Your heaps of laundry and drycleaning? We do all that too… We make being the perfect mom “look easy” and we pretend not to love the babies back because it makes mommy feel guilty and jealous when we receive the kisses mom and dad are missing out on.
    I don’t really know what any of this means or why I choose here or now to voice it… But as a nanny, I’m saddened that another story has surfaced to make my profession somehow look scandalous or “trashy” when I’ve spent a lifetime in servitude being anything but.

    03.06.16Reply
  153. Fran says:

    I must admit I would be crazy if I heard this happening. why don’t you guys DONT hire a nanny. nannies these days CANNOT be trusted! and since this happened the second time. DONT HIRE A NANNY ANYMORE JUST DONT

    03.12.16Reply
  154. Fiona says:

    Hi Eva,
    I am a little late to the discussion but I really wanted to add my two cents here… The trollish comments are out of line but unfortunately typical of our current social climate.
    What happened to you was terrible.
    And what I find disturbing is that you did all the right things. You sought references and opinions and advice before taking on a new nanny and you still found a lemon!
    It is so hard to find a good nanny and you tried. I hope things are different now and you have somebody reliable who isn’t in your bedroom sniffing your husband’s underpants. The people who are taking the nanny’s side have no idea what might have happened had you and your husband ignored it and tried to give her the benefit of the doubt.
    I live here in Hollywood and this woman may have turned out to be a bunny-boiler. I’ve heard terrible stories and witnessed my friends’ lives torn apart by stuff like this.
    The nanny’s text was no mistake. It’s called A Fishing Expedition.
    Congrats on marrying a man who is the antithesis of most men in a city where so many of them have personality and so few have character. I wish you and your family peace and happiness.

    03.20.16Reply
  155. Stephanie Taylor says:

    What a crazy story. I am so sorry that this happened to you! Kudos to your hubby for handling the situation like a rock star.

    03.31.16Reply
  156. Rachel says:

    If you need a nanny, I need a job. Trust me, I don’t want your husband. I’m done with men, and I need to focus on healing myself, and taking care of my own kids. Plus, I have been married to a man who constantly cheated on me. I know the pain of being cheated on, and the anger towards the girl he cheated with. I have no respect for skanks, and snakes. You have a wonderful husband, and a beautiful baby. You are truly blessed to be with someone like him. Yes, I wish I could have a man like that, but I’m still praying for my husband to grow up, and change. I stayed faithful to him throughout our marriage, despite the pain he caused with his infidelity. I stayed home to take care of our kids, while he worked to provide for us, and party for himself. God has better plans for my kids and I, so we will do as He commands, and He will reward us.

    04.29.16Reply
  157. Unanimous me says:

    Can I please first say , these are the kind of peopel I dream of working for , I have had it the opposite I cannot tell you he harrasment and frustration, and I mean literally I cannot from soe. Situations, nor would I do to confidentiality, but I’ve had a hard time in this buisness because of my honestly and morals, values and high standards, and I respect marriage and woman and the da city of that arrangement boundaries must be set, I have worked for many peopel who think money buys everything a nd I mean everything, I hid my tears and left households exiting quickly to escape sexual harrasment and cheating spouses who marked me , I’m older now but it was not just the ethics of marriage for my honesty and value system that rarely exists any more, my efforts for a balanced schedual so I coudl attend church, I never brought my beliefs to work or pushe them on anyone but I feel family is for most the basis of a haven and when someone invites yiu into there hoem it’s there prized possession thee is a intimacy to this haven they share . It’s been difficult to maintain me and stay in positions and then , yiu are asked why did yiu leave this job or taht job??? I’m not saying but yes it was the differences in what I feel should be held in high regard marriage or the simple principle of a individual lying and me having to wittness there belief system.are there any good men left , because what drss my respect for a man is how he treats his wife and a woman must knwo that she can trust whom she chooses to be in her home and with her children will add to this haven inside the home. I’m glade he fired the many , but just knwo that road is two sided and it’s been a nightmare in the past to find wounderful families who value morals. And agencies early care that a man is making unwanted advances. work for me has not always been a blessing. And finding really nice kind peopel. To work for who u derstand having a balanced life outside of work would be nice , even nicer if it was are respectful situation

    04.29.16Reply
    • Unanimous me says:

      Pleas edit text spell check whatever I think u get the point I was in a hurry and running out the door . Laughing now at all the typ Lisa’s I read just the begging u fortunate,y I must run, but great blog post excellent , I don’t even add married men on my facebook , pretty ado it about respect for other woman , again great blog

      04.29.16Reply
  158. Jessica Schmitz says:

    Hi! What a terrible experience! I know first hand how hard it can be to find proper child care!

    If you are still looking for help, and will be in Westchester for the summer, I am a teacher at a private Montessori school in CT and live in Westchester. We will be wrapping up the school year shortly, and I would like to keep busy over the summer! I would love to help you out!
    Jschmitz227@gmail.com

    04.29.16Reply
  159. See says:

    I found your blog by chance and never heard of you. He did great in terminating the nanny. I don’t trust Daycare as much as a Nanny, but that is just me. Usually, family can be asset in being a nanny. Just a thought.

    05.03.16Reply
  160. Sue says:

    wow twisted story – you would not think this kind of stuff happened out there except in the movies – Just shows you just have to be careful and try vet who you leave in your home.

    05.30.16Reply
  161. Thank you for your refreshing Truthful post. You grabbed and kept my attention to the end. Like you I am also a mother and busy wife, I have had almost every type of nanny in our home at one point or another. No Woman deserves to experience to have her( side kick/mother’s helper to babysitter), the “other woman ” in our homes, whom we Pay no less, to help us raise our children, only to find out she is or has, hit on our vulnerable & susceptible husbands. I am sure there are now many jaws in need of repair after reading this. May I suggest, merely as means towards doing ‘something to help’ what has gotten our marriage through similar situations is the use of an excellent Nanny Service, a company whose got your back and who can step in anytime to resolve such horrific normal within industry common circumstances. Why I am still married and my children have grown up to be great people as a result of a great group effort. Thank you again for sharing.

    07.25.16Reply
  162. Natasha Beverly Weetman Daniels says:

    Oh my gosh, this is shocking story! she is there to do her job not mess around! How rude! Good job Kyle sacked her! Well done Kyle 👏🏼 You have an incredible husband and family and shouldn’t be treated like that!

    10.20.16Reply