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My baby girl is three years old. Three whole years! I’ve been crying all week about it– reminiscing, looking at baby pictures, remembering every minute of her birth, and the first dazed and snuggly days of life as a Mama. The tears I’ve been shedding aren’t ones of sadness, but of pride. Of joy, of awe, of love, and of total disbelief that of all the people in the world this beautiful soul chose me to be her Mother.
Marlowe changed my life in so many ways. She forced me to look outside myself, to challenge myself, and most of all to forgive myself. I made so many mistakes in that first year of Motherhood– so many little things here and there that I wish I could have changed. Losing patience, mixing formula wrong, baths inadvertently too hot or too cold, turning my back for one second that resulted in a bruise or a bonk that I beat myself up for endlessly. It was a time that tore me down to my foundation and forced me to rebuild. I became a woman that year, in my honest opinion. I finally learned how strong I was, and also how human. Through it all, Marlowe loved me and forgave me. She was my North Star from the first moment, and has always been since. Even on my most fragile days, Marlowe would wrap her arms around my neck, bury her chubby cheeks in my chest– she would fall asleep in my arms and show me how much she trusted me and believed in me. She was my ultimate cheerleader as I navigated those dicey waters of first time parenthood. Marlowe is without a doubt my Best Friend, and I think this is why. She opened my heart and forced me to love myself as deeply as I fell in love with her. It was through her eyes that I finally recognized what a strong choice vulnerability can be.
I look at Marlowe today, three years old, and I am in awe of her. She is so much better than me in every way. She is so kind, so generous, her light so bright and her curiosity so strong. Not a day goes by that she doesn’t ask me completely earnestly: “How are you doing today, Mom?” Or my most recent favorite, “Mama, we are going to keep you FOREVER!” My favorite of all of Marlowe’s characteristics is how emotionally aware she is– always looking out for everyone, wanting the people she loves and anyone else she meets to be happy and healthy and fine. I’m so proud of her for this, and I take absolutely zero credit for it. It’s been her from day one.
Nobody makes me laugh like she does, no giggle makes my heart sing like hers. Her humor encourages me to be the goofy parent I’m proud to be. She inspired all of that. I truly don’t know who I would be or where I would be if she had never shot like a cannon in to my life and reconfigured it. Marlowe will always be the one who made me a Mother, and I can remember her challenging birth so vividly every year on her birthday. The truest of gifts.
Marlowe, I hope your life brings you the kind of joy that you inspire in me daily. I hope you know always how brightly your light shines, how unique you are in every way, and how steadfastly we are here for you. I’m so proud of you, beautiful girl! Happy Birthday, my little chicken nugget. Let’s party!
xoxo
EAM
Photographs by Stephanie Elliott Photography
Happy Birthday Marlowe <3 Love this post! I feel the same way about my son. They really break your heart wide open, don't they?
Happy Birthday, Marlowe!!
Happy Birthday Marlowe! Your post made me think of a song my mom and I consider “our song” In My Daughter’s Eyes. If you’ve never listened to it, make sure you have a whole box of tissues on hand. It is a great one!
This is such a beautiful tribute to both your girl and to motherhood! I was in tears the entire time, because I feel like the same way about my little girl who will be three this winter. Thank you as always for your sweet words that are so inspiring! Happy Birthday to Marlowe and you, mama!
Stop! You’re making me cry now. Happy birthday Marlowe!!
Feliz cumpleaños a Marlowe! Happy bday to Marlowe! And congrats to your mommy as well for making you into this beautiful happy soul! I don’t have children but I def hope they grow up to be like yours one day! You inspire me! 🙂
Motherhood. A forever bond. Bff. Unconditional love. This post ?
Happy birthday lowie. ?????
Today is my mom’s birthday and reading this makes me tear up! I don’t have any kids of my own yet but the mother daughter relationship is so special and I hope to have that with my daughter someday. Happy birthday, Marlowe!
Happy Birthday Marlowe!!!!
Happy birthday Marlowe! We love watching the special bond that you both have.
She has the sweetest smile. Happy Birthday Marlowe!
Literally balling crying at work while reading this! Very well written and describes how so many of us mamas feel. My daughter turned two in may and my son will be one next month – I feel yah!
So beautiful!!! I am a proud Mama to 4!! My littlest just turned 7 on the 4th. I remember 3. I remember 3 with ALL of my babies. 3 is a special year! When I think about “going back” for just ONE day with each of my children…that day typically happened during the time they were 3! Enjoy 3 Marlowe! Happiest of days, this one and all, to you!!
This is so sweet! HBD to your sweet girl! I related so much to this post and loved reading it!!
Happy 3rd Birthday, Marlowe!
Happy Birthday to your beautiful little girl ! You are a great mama and I love reading about your journey together 🙂
Marlowe is such a special little girls,love seeing videos of her and i enjoy watching her grow up,seeing her makes me happy,i wish her all the happiness in the world,i hope she continues to be this sweet,happy little girl that we all fell in love with
Don’t cut yourself short, you are the one that molded this beautiful child. I see how you are with her. You are a kind, loveable and respectful mother. Myself at the age of 61 are in awe of you. I have a daughter your age and a grandson who is 4 and a granddaughter who is 15 months. Be proud of yourself, you are doing an awesome job- Mom!❤️
What a beautiful heartfelt post❤️Amazing how we grow right along with our kids. I love being a mom. My youngest is 17 and headed to college next year. I can’t imagine having an empty nest! Enjoy every minute, they go so fast!
Happy Birthday Marlowe. She really does brighten my day on insta stories! Your post made me cry! Beautifully written!
Beautiful Post Eva about Marlowe and becoming a Mom…it’s funny how no matter how much you love all your children your first is your first of everything including the love
Cue the tears!! SUCH a beautiful post. It is very clear how much you adore your sweet girl, and Marlowe is equally as blessed to have you as her mother. I am a new mom of an 8-week old baby boy, and can understand completely all of the ways he will (and has already) changed me. There is nothing like motherhood. Completely unbelievable! So much love to you & Marlowe on your mother/daughter/best friend journey.
Beautifully said. My daughter turned three just a few days before Marlowe, and it’s got me feeling all the emotions! It’s incredible how fast these years have flown by, and amazing to see what a beautiful soul my daughter has. I love following your blog and Instagram because there’s so many similarities to my own little girl!
Aw, what sweet words! You’re making me cry! Enjoy all these moments and have fun at her party this weekend! Just as much a celebration for you as it is her for! 🙂
Happy Birthday to Marlowe, she is such a bright star! I wish she always feels happy and strong and bring joy and light to the people around her.I believe that her being loving and caring with others and having a good soul shows good parenting along with her innate character.Cause kids imitate everything, every little behaviour , sometimes we dont even realize it.Your post is so sweet, I relate to all the feelings you describe, I am too in awe of my son and think of how perfect he is about 500 hundred times a day!