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Marissa Hermer knows what it feels like to be an On-The-Go Mama! This week’s subject of Eight By Eva is the star of Bravo’s hit show, “Ladies Of London,” as well as a successful Restaurateur! Marissa and her husband, Matt Hermer, own popular restaurants Top Dog, Boujis, Bumpkin, and Eclipse in London. In between, she is the doting (and refreshingly honest!) Mama of two adorable little boys…with a third baby on the way! Here, Marissa answers my eight favorite questions:
1. What is the best parenting advice you have received?
I’ve received a lot of advice – but of the lot bestowed upon me over the years, I often remind myself of two bits of advice that I received – and also pass these along to fellow mothers. The first is that in becoming a mother, you will feel guilty. Embrace the guilt – it is part of it – and then move on and get on with it. Basically, as a mother, I do feel guilty if I’m not doing this for my child or that for my child – or I could be doing more – or if I’m in the office and not always with them on the playground. OR if I AM with them on the playground and then I’m guilty that I’m not in the office. It is a juggle and ultimately, one ball is going to drop – but it is about realizing that this is all part of it and then
getting on with things. The other piece of advice I’ve received is to trust my instincts – they are there for a reason. Mothers get bombarded with advice from friends, parents, community, etc. about how we ‘should’ be doing things – it is important to remember that one mothers way of doing things isn’t the same as another mother’s way of doing things – and that is okay. Mother the way you feel is right for you and your family.
2. What is your greatest challenge as a parent?
Finding enough hours in the day to do everything. I think I share this challenge with a lot of parents though – and until someone invents a way to get 25 hours in the day, it will forever be a challenge. I do find comfort when I carve out scheduled time to be with the kids – rather than just assuming it will happen sometime throughout the day. It doesn’t happen like this – I have to block out an afternoon in my diary for uninterrupted kid time – and then I have the comfort that it will happen.
3. What’s the latest with your kid(s)? Any new dynamics? Funny quirks? Challenges?
Our eldest is 4 which is such a brilliant age of curiosity – but of course does pose interesting challenges – for example last night he asked me to eat him as he wanted to see the baby in my tummy. Quickly followed by the question of ‘how did the baby get there’ (my response: Daddy put the baby there’) which of course led to 10 other questions! I’m not sure how to answer these questions as don’t want to lie but also don’t want, at this stage, to open the biology books.
4. What is your dream day as a family?
Cozy morning cuddles in bed followed by breakfast of pancakes, and then feeding the ducks in Hyde Park followed by dim sum which the kids love (and we do too as they can make a mess AND it is so quick so we are out of there in an hour before we get yelled at for making too much of a mess).
5. Kid item you can’t live without?
aden + anais Comfort Blankets. Both my kids had them from day one – they are easy to wash and great for traveling as provide a cuddly security but also I toss them over my kids face to block out the light for nap times on airplanes.
6. Favorite local kids activity?
We love going to Battersea Park Children’s Zoo – amazing play equipment and kids love visiting the monkeys and pigs. I also love baking with the kids – our kitchen turns into a flour sandpit but we love it.
7. How do you unwind?
After the kids are in their pjs, I actually find bedtime and story time very calming – evening cuddles with the kids really puts me at ease after a long day (of course, GETTING the kids out of the bath and in their pajamas isn’t always as relaxing!)
8. What are your favorite beauty products?
I can’t live without Sarah Chapman’s Overnight Facial and Hydrating Serum, L’Occitane’s Divine day cream smells SO good, and if I need to look somewhat decent, a lick of Bobbi Brown’s Your Majesty lippy makes me feel like I’ve made an effort.
Can’t believe I have two awesome women together, Eva and Marissa, in this post. Thank you for this! 😉
Hi Eva I was able to watch an episode or two of “Ladies of London” a few weeks ago online. I don’t watch a lot of reality shows, but you post here at your blog most of the time (75 to 85 percent of the time) some fun, helpful advice with wisdom.
I watched the episode “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner”?
Watching these women share with folks how to TALK ABOUT (sometimes nastily) and THEN not have a baby shower for the American woman’s twins, sometimes as I watched it made me wonder, are these women acquaintances as women, because those two fought with words, like they were a married couple or something.
Fortunately Marissa was there with manners, tact with sensitivity, as she admitted her mistakes,in helping to create the flame, that then the other two women, continued to add fuel to the fire.
I think some of the women on this show may benefit from some time with the millionaire matchmaker. That is a favorite show of mine that I have not watched in several years, but the woman who owns and operates that company is ethical and helps many people.
It is too bad there is not a show on tv and or the internet where people of prominence seek to date everyday people, modify their appearance reasonably, put together a plausible reasonable story. I believe that would be fascinating.
Goodness (ethics) is within the inner soul self first.
Also I would LOVE to see a show where people who break their wedding vows, have to face humiliating tasks and complete them, but also their would be a spiritual growth component.
One show that I sincerely miss is Beauty and the Geek. That was a special show, much wonderful growth took place with the people who participated in that show.
I was in London last fall for five days, saw amazing architecture, met fascinating people.
Now I am visiting the Golden State, but a wise humble intelligent women of ethics with inner and outer beauty, is busy with important work in Pennsylvania. She shares updates about once per week or so, she reminds me of Marissa, of her character after reading your interview with her, and watching that episode. My parents have passed on to the higher energy frequency in the past few years, so at a certain time your friends do become your family. My friend her name is Joan, a woman from a noble family.
She sees a better more peaceful world, as I do, but everyone is busy with their work, I wish she could set aside time away from her work. She is from Oregon, but she said a meeting in the Golden State could be soon.
But as all of us know life is hard, all you can do is be you, and stay in touch, and see what develops, sadly thou when Joan only texts to me, it is very one dimensional, I do not hear her emotions about the past few days or what is changing in good or less than good ways.
I do not judge, I just make observations. I believe when people get to know each other and there is distance in miles, talking on the phone and or skype makes much more sense.
But anthropologically human beings in the 21st century are not really human beings anymore, instead I observe we are mostly human screens, because that is how most of us communicate, no vocal tones, no facial expressions, nope, just white screens with words, with no understanding of what the other is experiencing in life.
Going for a nice walk with Joan for tea with coffee, stories, jokes, laughter, with a handmade valentine, some ice cream.
I know a woman such as Marissa, which Joan is, would enjoy this time with me together, it just would be nice to see Joan smile, while bringing her some laughter again too!
Sorry about the ramblings Eva, but sometimes rivers run, like that Carly Simon song, which was my mothers favorite, with dreamers waking the nation.
Anyway Eva, thanks for shining your humble light on Marissa. She is one of a kind, in a true sincere good way.
Greg Fillmore