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How I Met Kyle

Eva Amurri Martino and Kyle Martino pose together on the stairway of their Connecticut home

 

Kyle and I have a very good “Meet-Cute”, aka that scene in a Rom Com when the protagonists meet in the weirdest/cutest way that changes both of their lives forever.  The story of how we met is so good, in fact, that we used to tell it to crowds for a lot of years as a kind of party trick.  Ha! Somebody in the group would have heard it, and would demand we tell it to the rest of the dinner party so relentlessly until we were embarrassed enough (or flattered enough) to comply.  Usually Kyle would start, and I would have to finish, since he is (admittedly) the absolute WORST at remembering details and would skip like all of the good parts and get to the punchline too quickly.  Does anybody else’s husband do this? Like, the story about your engagement (for him) goes “So basically I gave her the ring, and she said Yes!” Wonh Wonh!! I, on the other hand, am far too good at remembering detail and reciting the nuances of every little thing (Hello, anxiety! Hello, Type A personality!) so I have kept the exact encounter so crisp in my mind.  I truly do remember it like it was yesterday.  In honor of Kyle’s birthday being yesterday, and reminding me how very lucky I am that he was born and that the stars aligned for us to meet each other one night in March in Los Angeles, I thought I would share the story here today.  This is how it went, all those years ago…

Eva Amurri Martino and Kyle Martino embrace on the stairway of their Connecticut home

Our Meet-Cute starts off with a really lame, really self-involved guy.  I had just met him at work, and was (relatively) newly single.  He asked me to go have a drink with him on a Saturday night and I said yes.  For the record, I didn’t know yet that he was really lame, I just noticed that he was cute and figured why not.  I got all dolled up, and when he showed up at my front door to pick me up, he was standing there with another guy.  UMMMMM.  He had brought his friend/roommate along to pick me up.  I found this (very) weird, but I figured hey maybe it’s an LA thing and his roommate is just driving with us to drop us off at the bar so we didn’t have to deal with a car and cocktails.  This was pre-Uber, obviously.  Dinosaurs still roamed the Earth.  Well, we parked the car, and both guys got out to walk with me to the bar where there was a ping pong party going on.  I suddenly realized I was on a date with two Men!  This (adult) man was doing what boys usually grow out of by Freshman year of college, aka, the Best-Friend-Vetting-Process.  On a FIRST DATE.  My eye roll could have been seen from outer space.  By this point, I really needed that drink.  As the three of us sat in the corner of Sky Bar in Los Angeles (is this story making you nauseous yet?) the two guys were just yukkin’ it up.  They were having the best time ever! So many fist bumps! So many inside jokes! So many internal eye rolls (me)! I had one of those moments of realization when I got very, very scared to be dating in Los Angeles.  I needed that drink ASAP, and here is the funny part– NEITHER OF THEM HAD OFFERED YET TO GET ME A DRINK. HAHAHAHHA! On a first date with two men, I then stood up and made my way over to the crowded bar to buy myself my own drink.  This is basically as low as it gets, in my opinion.  I mean what was even the point? As I stood in my heels, trying to find a space between bodies to call a bartender over and convince him to give me a bottle of wine with a straw in it, Kyle appeared next to me.

That’s right, people.  Contrary to what anyone and everyone will try to convince you of, YOU CAN meet your husband in a bar!! You can EVEN meet your husband in a bar when you are technically on a date with two other guys! Note to self: even when you think something is going very, very badly– something amazing might be just a moment away.

Back to the story.  So Kyle asked if he could buy me a drink.  Actually he said, “Hi, I noticed you over there earlier and I was wondering if I could buy you a drink tonight?” I said No.  Yes, that’s right: NO.  No way.  First of all, here was a stranger (he was staying at the adjacent hotel on business, apparently) and no matter how poor of a time I was having with Bozo #1 and Bozo#2, I was technically out in their company.  How rude would it be to just start talking and hanging out with another random guy up at the bar? I just thought to myself how mortified I would be if the tables were turned and the guy I had taken to a bar on a Saturday night sidled up and started sharing cocktails with some random chick. RUDE.  So I turned to this very handsome, young stranger and decline his offer based on the company I was currently keeping.  I pointed out my date and told him I was actually on a date with that guy over there.  He took it like a champ, said no problem, have a great night, and started backing away.  I took another look at him, saw my “dates” high fiving (literally) out of the corner of my eye, and came to my senses. “Wait!” I called after him, “You can buy me a Coke.  A Coke isn’t technically… a drink.  So, I think that would be fine.” Cool.  How embarrassed are you for me on a scale from one to ten? LOL. So he ordered me a Coke.  As we waited for it, we chatted a little bit.  I found out that he lived in NYC and was just in town for one more day, that he was American but had an Italian last name (I actually thought his last name was Martini for the first few weeks we were dating. Bars are loud.), that he used to play professional soccer, and that he could have a charming and witty conversation (hopefully indicating that he wasn’t a total psychopath or serial killer).  I was a little wary of the Ex-Pro Athlete angle, but decided to let it slide.  I figured I probably was never going to see this guy again, anyway.  My Coke came, and he asked for my number.  He wanted to hang out tomorrow, on his last day in LA.  Again, I said No.  “What do you mean no?” he asked me.  He seemed totally incredulous, but in a gut-punched way more than an entitled way.  “Well,” I told him, “I’m not going to spend my day tomorrow sitting by my phone wondering if you’re going to call me or not.  Give me your number.  If I want to hang out, I’ll call you.” That’s right, ladies! (By the way, men are obsessed with this.  It’s so funny how true that cliché is about men wanting what they can’t have) “Damn!” He said, with a laugh.  “Ok, take my number then.”  I put it in my phone and was just saving it (under “Martini”…lol) when I looked up again to say goodbye and thank you…and he had disappeared.  I then looked over to my “date” and saw that Kyle had walked right over to him and was TALKING TO HIM.

Eva Amurri Martino and Kyle Martino embrace on the couch of their Connecticut home

Shit. No! I was frozen in my heels.  What was this guy doing?! My cover was officially blown! Did he know him? Were they talking about me? I was so panicked.  Suddenly, I saw Kyle shake my date’s hand, and then walk out of the bar.  My date did NOT seem pleased.  He got my coat and my purse from the banquet and walked over to me.  What happened next with that guy is totally boring, basically it was like “ummm like we’re going to go to this girl;’s party and do you want to come you totally don’t have to come but can if you want to but yeah this date is basically over ok bye” Ha!  Just to torture them, I did end up forcing my way to the other bar with them where I  (thank God, people!) found an open bar, had a free cocktail, and made my way home to play Wii Tennis.  The next morning, I texted Kyle.

“Looks like you didn’t mind getting me in to trouble last night.” He responded right away.  He was at the Santa Monica Pier (Welcome to my husband: ten year old inside a thirty year old body.  Like the movie “Big”) and did I want to come hang out with him and his friends? I will let you in on one of my dating secrets right here and let you know that I NEVER think that a “casual” first date is a good idea.  Ever.  If a guy wants to date you, he can make a reservation, take you to dinner, and show a little respect.  This can be at a nice restaurant, or at a Wendy’s, but the point is that there has to be planning involved, BY HIM. Period.  No casual first dates! Obviously, I said No.  Then I made up a fictitious party I had to be at by 10pm and told him if he wanted to hang out, he could have me from 7-9.  His text back: “I’ll pick you up at 7 for dinner”.

That night, I got dressed up and pulled out the big guns.  A very tight, very sexy dress.  I still didn’t know if I even liked this guy– we had only spoken for less than five minutes at a crowded bar– but I wanted to make sure that whatever happened, he would be a little bit tortured.  I think these guys (especially ex-pro athletes, for goodness sake) can stand to be a little tortured by a woman.  It builds character. When he arrived to pick me up, it was pouring with rain.  I ran out to his rental car, and jumped in to the passenger seat, slamming the door beside me.  I turned to him, and suddenly like a ton of bricks, I was hit with a feeling I had never had before in my life.  Inexplicably, I felt that comfort and peace that you feel when you’re finally home after a long day, with your person.  I was so shocked to be feeling that way, in this strange car with this strange guy, that I was rendered speechless.  I had goosebumps.  Kyle was nervous, I could tell, and was talking a mile a minute– easily making up for my speechlessness.  We got to the restaurant, and sat down at a table.  The next  five hours went by in a flash.  To make a long story short, we ended up closing down the restaurant.  The waiter had to come back to our table five or six times to take our order– we hadn’t even cracked a menu.  We found out a lot about each other that night, but something bigger than that was happening.  I remember sitting in my chair, fork in hand, and looking across the table from me– barely hearing what Kyle was saying. I just looked at him, this funny young man in a horrendous (far too large) button down shirt, super weird side burns, slick talking personality, drinking about eleven Jack-And-Cokes (nervous much, Kyle?) and all I could think of was: “Remember this moment.  Remember it with all you’ve got– because you’re going to tell your grandchildren about this.”  Tears spring to my eyes even thinking about it now.  What I realized that night at dinner was that Kyle and I would have a long road ahead of us, that we had so much to learn about each other, so many compromises to make, so many imperfections between us– but I knew, like I knew my own face in the mirror, that this would be the person I did life with.  At a certain point I got up to go to the bathroom, and texted my Mom: “I’m having dinner with the guy I’m going to Marry.”

Eva Amurri Martino and Kyle Martino embrace on the couch in their living room in Connecticut

 

By this point in the story, somebody always chimes in impatiently to ask: “But what did Kyle say to that GUY?!”  I’m getting to that.  By the time dessert came (and I had declared my future with this guy to my Mother) I thought it was probably a fine time to bring up his little convo with Mr. Bromance.  “Not to beat a dead horse,” I told him, “But what did you say to that guy last night when you went up to him after we talked at the bar?”  Kyle go that twinkle in his eyes that is still one of my favorite things about my husband, and said “Oh, that guy.  Well, I walked up to him and said ‘You’re here with Eva right?’ He said ‘Uh, yeah.’ So I said, ‘She’s pretty great, right?’ And he kind of looked at me like I was a weirdo and said ‘Yeah…'”

At this point Kyle paused for effect. “So I told him, ‘Well, she took my number, do you think she’s going to call me? Put in a good word!’ Then I shook his hand and walked out of the bar.”

I literally gasped. “What?! Oh my god Kyle, that’s crazy!”

He was already laughing.  “Well, I had to ruin your date! What if you had ended up having a good time? You never would have called me.” My husband, ladies and gentlemen.  My husband. Never afraid to go after what he wants, even when it’s a challenge– especially when it’s a challenge.  Also no wonder our children are part-Rascal.  LOL.

 

And then, after five months of long distance dating, many revelations, bad fights, good conversations, so many laughs, ups and downs galore– we lived Happily Eva After.  The End!

 

 

 

Photographs by Courtney Ann Photography

 

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69 Comments

  1. Sue says:

    LOVE A LOVE STORY!

    Love to all!
    Sue

    02.20.17Reply
  2. Alexis Denn says:

    I love this. I don’t even really know you and I have a tear in my eye.

    So cute.

    02.20.17Reply
  3. Nicole says:

    So cute! I had the exact experience on my first date with my hubby. Right down to texting my best friend that I was on a date with my future husband! So special!

    02.20.17Reply
  4. Danielle says:

    Hi Eva! Just read your meet cute story on my commute into manhattan. I love your writing bc I share your type A/major anx personality. I have also sadly been devastated by a miscarriage and happily also met my husband in a bar! I looove everything you write and just wanted to let you know! xo

    02.20.17Reply
  5. Shae says:

    Do you think you will have more kids?

    02.20.17Reply
  6. Vanessa says:

    Eva, the night you met Kyle, you didn’t Google him to make sure his “pro athlete” claim was legit!? That would’ve been one of the first things I would have done. Seems like you didn’t have to, though. Random meeting turns into domestic bliss. 😊

    Very cute story – thanks for sharing. Gives hope to us singletons.

    02.20.17Reply
    • Ha! No I actually just figured he would have to be an absolute crazy person to lie about something that I could easily look up.

      I personally think Google has killed dating…more on that another day…

      02.25.17Reply
      • Srishti says:

        OMG! This reminds me of the “Lorenzo Von Matterhorn” from that one episode of HIMYM… OH WAIT that was you hahaha!!

        03.02.17Reply
  7. Natalie says:

    EVA!!! Such a cute story!

    02.20.17Reply
  8. Kassie says:

    Omg Eva! The first time I heard this story was from kel who had gotten off the phone with Kyle that next day when he got back to NY and that did NOT do it justice! Hahha, you did tho! Such a cute story and I just remember feeling so excited for Kyle during this time. We just love you guys and hope you are doing well!!

    02.20.17Reply
  9. vicky says:

    Love it!!!

    02.20.17Reply
  10. Elizabeth says:

    Loved this!!!

    02.20.17Reply
  11. Molly says:

    Oh my GOSH! This story is EVERYTHING! It gave me such chills. Thank you so much for sharing! xo

    02.20.17Reply
  12. Malissa says:

    Love this so much!

    02.20.17Reply
  13. Martha says:

    That man is so nauty!😁

    02.20.17Reply
  14. Yasmin Wallace says:

    Such a good story! I got many laughs out of it. What a bold thing for him to do, takes balls to do that! The stars really did align 🙂

    02.20.17Reply
  15. Rocio says:

    Awww…what a sweet story. 😊

    02.20.17Reply
  16. Christy says:

    Love that you shared this!! Youre humor is so adorable and made me laugh. I love the way you share your stories. My husband and I shared a few pushed together by the stars moments before we were married. He still tells the story 20+ years later ♡♡♡……well his version anyway ; )

    02.20.17Reply
    • “His version” Ha!!! Isn’t that always the case 😉

      02.25.17Reply
  17. Jacqueline says:

    LOVE everything about this!!!!! 😍😍😍

    02.20.17Reply
  18. Jen C says:

    I love this story!! Love following your blog and IG. My husband and I argue over what really happened when we got together. 15 years and a lot of cheap cocktails on the night in question will do that I guess 🙂

    02.20.17Reply
  19. Nancy says:

    Oh my goodness! I love this! 😭😭

    02.20.17Reply
  20. Melissa says:

    Best story ever!

    02.20.17Reply
  21. Andrea says:

    Lamest date ever turns into the most important moment of your life! I love it!

    02.20.17Reply
  22. Jenna says:

    Did you buy him a new button down shirt for the second date? 😂😂

    02.20.17Reply
    • Actually about a month in to dating, I did a serious closet “edit” for him and helped him find some better stuff. Like, for example, clothes that fit him! I’ll need to post pics from the “before” on the blog sometime…tragic is all I can say….LOL

      02.25.17Reply
  23. cindy says:

    you are a great story teller. and you’re right, this is RomCom material. you were out with two boys and a MAN swept you off your feet.

    congratulations on finding your person.

    02.20.17Reply
  24. Birdie says:

    Oh. My. God. I’m reading this after a hard morning of one slap in the face after the other by my love life, and all I can say is, thank you! I laughed, I cringed, I smiled, but mostly I read a story that gave me hope that one day I will find the guy who would ruin dates with other guys to be with me. I needed this, thank you!!!

    02.20.17Reply
    • …and by the way– if he isn’t willing to do that, he’s not worth it. As somebody who is married w kids and has been knocked around a lot by life the past five or six years I will tell you that you NEED a connection like that to get through it together.

      Wait for it!!!!!

      02.25.17Reply
  25. Laura says:

    Ok weird question. Did Kyle’s reaction to him finding out Susan Sarandon is your mom have any influence on how much you liked him? Or in general was that a thing you looked out for when you were dating? Like, if the guy reacted a little too startruck? Just wondering haha

    02.20.17Reply
    • Ha! No not really. I have a pretty good radar for inauthenticity (you develop it quick when you grow up in the spotlight). I never really had this be an issue for me, but I also always met people through friends etc before Kyle!

      02.25.17Reply
  26. Angelina says:

    My fiancé and I met in a bar, too! It CAN happen that way 🙂

    What a lovely story – thanks for sharing!

    02.20.17Reply
  27. Patty Guinn says:

    OMG, this is such a great story and so you!!! So here I am reading and thoroughly enjoying it when my husband interrupts and says that he really WOULD LIKE ME TO BAKE CAKE???? Oh my.. I will have to go back and continue this saga.
    Loving it and you.

    02.20.17Reply
  28. Diana says:

    This could be a movie! Lovely story 🙂

    02.20.17Reply
  29. Holly says:

    Oh my gosh, this is so adorable! Thank you for sharing! <3

    02.20.17Reply
  30. Alessan says:

    Beautiful story Eva! I’m 21 and I have always been worried to meet guys in bars as I am not one for the bar scene and barely ever go to the bar. Your story has given me hope that you can find a decent guy at a bar despite the reputation it has!! How old were you guys when you met? 🙂
    Wish me luck with my search for Mr. Perfect!!

    02.20.17Reply
    • Srishti says:

      I’m the same exact age and feel the same way – right down to this story giving me hope for meet-cutes @ bars!

      02.21.17Reply
      • Alessan says:

        Exactly!!! So glad I’m not alone! Thanks girl 😊

        02.22.17Reply
    • Oh my gosh, you have PLENTY of time! I was 24 when we met and honestly that was kind of on the younger side. Good love is worth waiting for though, no matter how long it takes

      02.25.17Reply
  31. Theresa says:

    I love, love how you met stories. I never get tired of hearing them. Love it!

    02.20.17Reply
  32. Leigh says:

    Wonderful story. Reminiscing, hindsight through rose-colored glasses it seems sometimes. Some say never look back, but you can’t stop your heart…
    Love your stories and Instagram. Always fun and happy and full of love! Makes me miss those days with my children!!
    Keep up the lovely sharing! Thank you…

    02.21.17Reply
  33. Sylvia says:

    i would love to read Kyle’s version of “How I met Eva” – I bet it would be just as awesome as yours! Love it!

    02.21.17Reply
    • Ummm no, it would be three sentences and very boring. lol. Trust me!

      02.25.17Reply
  34. Stephanie Almhem says:

    OMG!! I know the AHA moment standing in a bar picturing your future with the one! This reminds me so much of my time with my husband. I absolutely love this story and totally agree that I go into much more detail telling our love story. Hubby is not a fan of retelling how we met only because he gets so embarrassed.

    02.21.17Reply
  35. Maggie says:

    I love this! I have a good friend who met her husband in a bar-success stories are the best. My husband and I have a similar experience when it comes to people asking us to tell the story of how we met- I had just starting working at a summer recreation program for 4th & 5th graders and he worked there. A few days into the summer, some of the 5th grade girls decided that they wanted to plan a wedding for me and him. I had no idea who he was but I thought “hey- if they’ll have fun, I’ll go along with it.” They ended up planning a wedding for us complete with invitations, a preacher (one of the other staff), a dad to walk me down the aisle (also another staff), a wedding party (some 5th grade boys & girls who showed up in suits and dressed that day!), rings, music, cake, etc. Everyone in the program attended our “wedding” that day. I had a boyfriend at the time but my husband and I finally got together officially almost a year later. I still have the pipe cleaner ring that the kids made for me and we both still work at the same place so people love to hear about how we met.

    02.21.17Reply
    • Oh my gosh that is TOO cute!! I love it! Such a good story

      02.25.17Reply
  36. Lee says:

    OK, this is hands down one of the best “how we met” stories! I laughed, I teared up…agh, so wonderful! Thanks for sharing.

    02.21.17Reply
  37. Dan Woog says:

    Fantastic story. I’ve heard bits and pieces. You tell it waaaaaaaaaaay better than Kyle!

    02.21.17Reply
  38. Lovely story Eva,i enjoyed reading,so sweet 🙂

    02.21.17Reply
  39. Savannah says:

    Loved this. Beginning to end, you guys are THE cutest couple EVA (see what I did there?) LOL! I love my own love story as well, met on Plenty of Fish…his screen name was Islandguy87, mine was Islandgirl85 (we live on an island, and those were our birth years…it was fate from the beginning). After some emailing back and forth, and some failed first date attempts (nerves got in the way and there was some cancellations). We met, and the minute he walked in the door, I was hooked. I called my BFF from the bathroom and told her I was on a date with my future husband. I married him…And thank goodness for our meet-cute. It was perfect. <3 Cheers to the lovers!

    02.22.17Reply
  40. Tina says:

    Great story!! Loved reading it🎉
    And you really make me laugh because i thought I was the ONLY person on this planet who would Turn out a guy (who seems great) not to Hurt an asshole’s feelings because you are already on a date with Him…haha 😂
    But happilly for us a great guy (well 2 different great guys i mean😀😜) came to our rescue and this is the universe thanking us for Being so Nice…;-)
    Love
    Tina

    02.23.17Reply
    • LOL! Go us! ha

      02.25.17Reply
      • Tina says:

        😉

        02.25.17Reply
      • Tina says:

        But Eva 2 weeks without newsletters… I’m desperate!!😘😘😉

        02.25.17Reply
        • Oh no you must not be on the list correctly! There have been newsletters the past few weeks!! Try signing up again. Or maybe they go to your spam box? Sorry about that! xx

          02.26.17Reply
          • Tina says:

            I signed up with another email adress… not in my spam that’s weird i always cet it but not the 2 last fridays…
            Anyway thanks for answering and told me…;-)

            02.26.17
  41. Marina says:

    My Dear! You definitely have a gift for making people laugh and feel so real – you truly are using what god gave you!

    And I believe many of us know that moment of feeling our soulmate’s energy as if we have finally come home after a weary journey. Same for me.

    Can you do a PART II?!?!

    I would love to hear you continue the story on how you made your long distance work, the compromises, why it was worth it to keep going, and how you both had to get raw and real…

    Would be SO great!

    02.23.17Reply
    • Tai says:

      I’m with Marina on this one! Tell us more!

      02.24.17Reply
  42. Tai says:

    OMG, Eva, this is why your blog is irresistible. Seriously, when you share your personal stories, it just feels like we are friends. Such a funny thing.

    There’s a tiny tiny typo where you say “Kyle go that twinkle in his eyes…” where you want to say “Kyle GOT that twinkle…” if you care about that stuff, honestly it doesn’t matter at all because this story is beautiful.

    Also, if I was in the room with you, it would be hard for you to finish because I’m such a detail person too! What did that sexy dress look like? What color? Black/Red/Purple? How did you know you were going to marry him even though he was wearing that awful shirt? What helped you see through is slick-talk? What are your other dating tips? Again, great story, you left me wanting more!

    Thank you for sharing yourself. It’s quite generous. Have a great weekend.
    –Tai

    02.24.17Reply
  43. Heidi says:

    Gosh. You make me want to find love again. Thanks for adding sparkle into this world.

    02.24.17Reply
  44. Robyn says:

    Soulmate!!! I love this story Eva!!! Thank you for sharing. For making my day. Have you seen the movie with Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet The Holiday? That is where I first learned what a “Meet-Cute” was. What an incredible story. Love it!!! Have a wonderful weekend!! Robyn

    03.03.17Reply
  45. Amber Pierce says:

    I loved hearing this story. You guys give me hope!

    03.03.17Reply